May 23, 2008 Expect The Unexpected.

Well, its been quite a week!
For starters, I've been having some odd cravings--for sweets, carbs, other stuff I basically don't eat anymore. I think it may be a hormonal thing--sort of like PMS, but without the period. I've been wanting 'just a little more' of things like raisins, cheerios, granola, but not the proteins or veggies. So I'm thinking that's the likely explanation.
On Sunday, we went to a friend's house for the afternoon and for dinner. I planned ahead--brought a chicken burger, a salad, and some tortilla chips. We had baked chocolate chip cookies, which I was happy to see I didn't really crave. Once there, I was fine with what I'd brought. But with everyone eating cookies, I was feeling a bit left out. I decided to have one Hershey kiss, with my dinner that evening. Just a little something to look forward to. So, after we all had dinner, I had my treat. It was good. Very yummy. But i can honestly say I got more satisfaction from the first time I ate cottage cheese! I felt good about how that went--I think I handled it very well.

On Tuesday, I got on the scale and found that I was up .4 pounds. OK, probably the hormonal thing. Also, i've been SO constipated! So not a big deal. I'd been to the nutritionist on Monday and knew I was doing great with the food, so I wasn't worried.
On Wednesday, I suddenly had to drop everything and take Laura up to St. Barnabas for 48 hours for EEG monitoring. So I threw together some things I knew I'd need--yogurt, cottage cheese, apples, pears, V8, nuts, tea, boluses, and some organic sugar. I knew i could get Cheerios there, so breakfast was covered, and snacks, I'd just have to deal with lunch and dinner.
That turned out not to be as easy as I'd hoped. I got to dinner late on Wednesday, and there wasn't much left. I ended up with a salad with grilled chicken and raspberry viniagrette dressing, and a sweet potato. Not too bad, but not great either. For a snack, the best I could do was some Fritos with my protein bolus. Thursday was Thai food day--NOTHING I could eat. So I had the salad with chicken again for lunch, with Fritos. For dinner I had hoped for a different menu, but no such luck. So I ended up with a roast beef wrap--roast beef, lettuce and tomato, with a bit of oil and vinegar in a whole wheat wrap. Again, not great, but it was ok. I noticed that today's menu included lentil soup. GREAT!! Add a little chicken and I'm good to go! Well, we left today before lunch, so I never did get that lentil soup (ended up with Wendy's chili, which was fine). In the meantime, there was temptation everywhere--so many poor choices available to me. Last night I actually considered a McFlurry! (until I checked the nutritional info and found it was 620 calories and 18 grams of fat!!) I made do with a couple bites of Laura's each night. I looked at myself in the mirror and said "it's not worth it". I am doing too well to mess it up for something stupid like that.
So today, we came home. I'm beyond tired, from sleeping on the sorry excuse for a "parent bed" at the hospital. The first night I didn't get more than 4 hours sleep. Last night I did a little better after the nurse showed me how to put the whole thing together and make a more reasonable "bed". But we had to stay up until midnight (so Laura would be sleep deprived), so I didnt' get enough then either. We were running to get everything done--pick up stuff at the pharmacy, get Danny from aftercare, get to cooking school (we were a few minutes late), grab dinner, go to the chiropractor, and go pick up Duke from doggie camp. I knew I didnt' have time to throw something together for my dinner, and I didnt' want to wait and eat at 7:30 or 8 when we got home. So I checked the nutritional values, calculated what I needed, and made a decision I was comfortable with. And then, when we stopped for dinner, I had pizza along with the kids--2 plain slices. I blotted off the extra oil--there wasn't much. I enjoyed it. Didn't excite me like the cottage cheese, or the watermelon I had a church on Sunday, but it was good.
Why pizza? Well, I decided that I am living in the real world, and I have to be realistic. There are just going to be days when the best I can do is pizza. Or a roast beef wrap. Or Wendy's chili. And that is OK. It's not everyday. I probably won't have pizza again until we're on vacation, if then. But it's nice to know I CAN do it.
Of course, then there's the issue of exercise, or lack thereof. I didn't get to the gym Wednesday before I found out we had to go to the hospital, so it's been 3 days of no exercise. Tomorrow I will go to the gym in the morning if the washer repairman gets here in time. Otherwise, I'll go for a walk in the evening. Sunday the kids are with their father, so I am going for sure. Monday too, even if the kids have to sit on the sidelines and play video games.
It will be interesting to see what the scale says on Tuesday. In the meantime, I know I'm doing a good job, and people have been noticing!