Seven years ago today I died. In the recovery room, after my gastric bypass, weighing 486 pounds, I pulled out my breathing tube (I wasn't even awake yet). They couldn't get it back in. I stopped breathing. My heart stopped. I died. CPR followed, and finally the anesthesiologist was able to get a pediatric breathing tube into me.
And then, I lived.
I woke up the next afternoon in ICU, still on a ventilator. Not the greatest beginning to my journey, but a beginning nonetheless. Four days later I was home. At two weeks, my entire incision opened up, and I spent 2 months with visiting nurses coming to pack the wound. Finally, it closed.
Then came the hernia. The first of 6. And then the reconstructive surgeries--breast reduction and lift, arm lift, tummy tuck, a thigh lift so badly botched it left my right thigh 2 inches bigger than the left. And a non-healing abdominal wound--for over 5 years. I traded in my size 4X-5X, catalog only clothing, my shortness of breath with ANY exertion, including just talking, the inablility to do so many things most people take for granted--walk more than 10 feet, fly on a plane, go to the movies or a concert, tie my own shoes. In exchange, I got the hernias, barfing after eating anything that didn't quite agree with me, hair loss, and the inability to eat more than a tiny amount of food at one time.
Oh, and I got weight loss. LOTS of weight loss. One year after the surgery, I weighed 273. I'd lost 213 pounds. I could walk. i could tie my shoes. I could go to the movies, fly on a plane, all those things I hadn't been able to do before. I was a size 24--I could even buy clothes at the mall sometimes. But I wasn't done.
Over the next year, as my weight loss slowed dramatically, I got down to 236 pounds--a loss of 250. Then, I got careless. I played with 10 or 20 pounds for awhile, then 30, then more, and before I knew it, I was 6.5 years out, and I'd regained 50 pounds. Something had to give, and soon.
On January 2, 2008, I started the newest leg of my journey. Having lost 10 pounds since November (after the 6th hernia repair), I started back to the gym. And for the first time in my life, I liked it! I started eating better, but the weight was slow to come off--just a pound a week, from the start. I joined a Biggest Loser challenge on the DIS, for support and encouragement. After 2 weeks, I went to Canyon Ranch and discovered organic eating. I also learned 2 weeks later that I was sensitive to wheat, dairy, and egs, so I eliminated them. My weight loss picked up a bit. On February 12, I found SparkPeople. I had been writing down everything I ate since I got back from Canyon Ranch--now i was putting it into the computer. I could tell exactly how much fat, protein, carbs, fiber, and calories I was getting each day. My exercise increased. I was LOVING going to the gym. The weight started falling off--4 pounds a week, 3 pounds, 4.5 pounds...something was working. And I found a whole community of people who actually understood what was going on.
Today it is 7 years since that day that I died. That day I chose, albeit unconsciously, to live again. Today I weigh 234 pounds. I have lost 252 pounds--more than half my weight. I wear a size 18-20W. I can walk 2 miles. I can do an hour on the elliptical. I can wear all my "skinny" clothes, and some are even too big. I have the smallest waist in my family. My children told me today that I look nice, and I'm not fat anymore, well, maybe just a little fat. (gotta love those kids!) I take my supplements religiously, exercise with pleasure, and make sure to get in lots of protein. I'm healthier than I've been in years. Not too surprising, since the last time I weighed this little was 15 years ago, in 1993!!
But I'm not done yet. I'd set a goal of 210 pounds, and that still stands, sort of. I've been thinking lately that I might want to go lower. And since my body seems to be shedding weight like a snake sheds its skin, I think my body would like to go lower too. So once I hit that 210 mark, I'll just keep going and see where my body takes me.
In July, I am going to Scotland. I've wanted to do this for over 20 years, and now I am doing it. I wanted to be in good shape for this trip, and now I am. I wanted to be able to walk and sightsee and enjoy things without pain, and now I can. I don't know how much more I'll lose by then, but whatever it is will only help matters. When I return, I will continue my journey down the scale for as long as my body decides to do so. And when I find a comfortable spot, I'll settle in there. My fat days are gone. Forever. I will not go back, only ahead. No longer will I abuse my body with excess food and with chemicals and additives that poison it. My body is a temple, and I will treat it as such. After all, if I don't take care of my body, where will I live? And I plan to live a long, long time.
Monday, February 16, 2009
May 6, 2008 Feeling Like Myself Again
After seeing the surgeon yesterday and getting a big thums up for my wonderful healing skin graft, I was feeling pretty good.
Today it was 70 degrees +, and I decided it was time for a walk. So I went for a nice walk after lunch--a good mile. It felt SO good to be moving again! I've decided to do it again tomorrow, and then, weather permitting, at least one or two more times this week. I see the doctor again on Monday and I'll ask when I can resume the TM and elliptical. Hopefully soon!
Meanwhile, the scale was down 3.4# this week! Yay!!! I'd been a bit concerned, since the lack of exercise might have been a problem. But it seems to be going fine. The most exciting part is, I'd set a goal to be under 240# by the time I go to Scotland. Well, today I'm 238.6, so I made it 81 days in advance!!! So I've reset the goal to under 230#, and I might need to change that again before we go!
I realized when I was walking that I'm still tired post surgery and anesthesia, but I'm feeling MUCH more like my old self. I know it usually takes a good week to shake the effects of the anesthesia, so I've still got a couple of days. Hopefully be Thursday I'll be all he way back. I'm really glad, since I wasn't sure how this post-op course was going to be. I've been pleasantly surprised.
I'm allowed to drive again, but had planned to wait until Thursday, a full week. Well, I had to drive to the drugstore to get a new prescription for Laura--her allergies are just awful, so the doctor said we'd try Clarinex. The insurance company denied it, so while we fight it, I had to pay out of pocket. $132 !!!!!! Sheesh, what's it made of? Gold dust?
Anyway, the Ex was supposed to pick Laura up at 6:10 to take her to her therapy group. I looked up and noticed it was 6:19 and there was no sign of him. Tried calling, not home. Got his wife on her cell, she's not heard from him. So we hopped in the car and I drove her there. He arrived about 5 minutes after we left, and was apparently a bit cheesed off that we weren't here. Well, duh! What did he expect me to do? He WAS almost 15 minutes late! As it was, she was late for her group. She missed last week when I went to say goodbye to my Aunt, so she wasn't missing again. In any event, the driving was fine. My head is clear--no pain meds to interfere, and it's not exactly strenuous to drive my SUV. Basically, I can do pretty much everything except shower and exercise. (and it may be good that if I can't do one, I can't do the other!!!)
I'm just so grateful that I'm finally healing. I know the protein is helping--even the resident said that when I saw the doctor yesterday. So I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, and let the healing progress.
Today it was 70 degrees +, and I decided it was time for a walk. So I went for a nice walk after lunch--a good mile. It felt SO good to be moving again! I've decided to do it again tomorrow, and then, weather permitting, at least one or two more times this week. I see the doctor again on Monday and I'll ask when I can resume the TM and elliptical. Hopefully soon!
Meanwhile, the scale was down 3.4# this week! Yay!!! I'd been a bit concerned, since the lack of exercise might have been a problem. But it seems to be going fine. The most exciting part is, I'd set a goal to be under 240# by the time I go to Scotland. Well, today I'm 238.6, so I made it 81 days in advance!!! So I've reset the goal to under 230#, and I might need to change that again before we go!
I realized when I was walking that I'm still tired post surgery and anesthesia, but I'm feeling MUCH more like my old self. I know it usually takes a good week to shake the effects of the anesthesia, so I've still got a couple of days. Hopefully be Thursday I'll be all he way back. I'm really glad, since I wasn't sure how this post-op course was going to be. I've been pleasantly surprised.
I'm allowed to drive again, but had planned to wait until Thursday, a full week. Well, I had to drive to the drugstore to get a new prescription for Laura--her allergies are just awful, so the doctor said we'd try Clarinex. The insurance company denied it, so while we fight it, I had to pay out of pocket. $132 !!!!!! Sheesh, what's it made of? Gold dust?
Anyway, the Ex was supposed to pick Laura up at 6:10 to take her to her therapy group. I looked up and noticed it was 6:19 and there was no sign of him. Tried calling, not home. Got his wife on her cell, she's not heard from him. So we hopped in the car and I drove her there. He arrived about 5 minutes after we left, and was apparently a bit cheesed off that we weren't here. Well, duh! What did he expect me to do? He WAS almost 15 minutes late! As it was, she was late for her group. She missed last week when I went to say goodbye to my Aunt, so she wasn't missing again. In any event, the driving was fine. My head is clear--no pain meds to interfere, and it's not exactly strenuous to drive my SUV. Basically, I can do pretty much everything except shower and exercise. (and it may be good that if I can't do one, I can't do the other!!!)
I'm just so grateful that I'm finally healing. I know the protein is helping--even the resident said that when I saw the doctor yesterday. So I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, and let the healing progress.
May 3, 2008 Life In The Real World
Today I went to my Aunt Anne's funeral. It was very nice, and of course very sad. Knowing that she is in heaven is very comforting--I know I'll see her again one day.
I had not expected to be able to go today, since I thought I'd be on bed rest until Monday. But surgery went very well, and I don't have to stay in bed. I can sit up, walk around a bit, just have to take it easy. So I asked if I could go and the good doctor said yes. I am so grateful for the blessing of being able to go
.After the funeral, we went to eat at a place my aunt and uncle always liked to go. I wondered what I'd do about food. I'd eaten an early lunch before we left, about 11:15, but it was like 4:30 and I was hungry, so I couldn't just sit there and not eat. First they brought out salad, the dressing was already on it. Italian dressing, and LOTS of it. OK, I can use the extra fats right now, so I had some salad. It was good. The next course was naturally pasta, since we were in Trenton and that is just the way they do it there. I decided to have a little bit. About 1/2 cup, with about 1/4 cup of meat sauce. It was the best pencil points I ever ate! (Pencil points is like a penne type of pasta, it's THE thing in Trenton, NJ) I was glad I'd decided to have some. The main course was veal parm and chicken cacciatore. I skipped the veal and went with the chicken. A thigh and a leg, about 3 ounces total. And some green beans that seemed to be cooked in olive oil with maybe some butter--agian more fat that I'd have used, but I needed the extra so it was fine. The chicken was moist and tender. There were cookies for dessert--Pepperidge Farm, which I love. I felt no desire to have any. I came home, plugged it all into Spark People, and it turns out I did PERFECT!!! With a little snack tonite, including my protein bolus, I'm right on target on all nutrients for the day!
I'm glad to know that I can go out in the "real world" and eat, and make good choices and stay within the parameters I need to be in. It proves that this is a lifestyle change that I can live with. I'll be more precise at home, and when I'm "out there" I'll do the best I can, and it will all work out fine.
I also got to wear some of my old "skinny clothes"--it was cool and grey today, so I needed something warmer, and it worked out fine. Not likely I'll ever wear them again, so I'm glad I had the chance.
Now I'll spend the rest of the weekend taking it VERY easy, just sitting quietly and letting my tummy rest. I feel fine, just tired. Hopefully I'll get a good report from the doctor on Monday, and things will be healing well. I didn't overdo today, I was very careful. I felt it went well, and I'm just so glad for the chance to go.
I had not expected to be able to go today, since I thought I'd be on bed rest until Monday. But surgery went very well, and I don't have to stay in bed. I can sit up, walk around a bit, just have to take it easy. So I asked if I could go and the good doctor said yes. I am so grateful for the blessing of being able to go
.After the funeral, we went to eat at a place my aunt and uncle always liked to go. I wondered what I'd do about food. I'd eaten an early lunch before we left, about 11:15, but it was like 4:30 and I was hungry, so I couldn't just sit there and not eat. First they brought out salad, the dressing was already on it. Italian dressing, and LOTS of it. OK, I can use the extra fats right now, so I had some salad. It was good. The next course was naturally pasta, since we were in Trenton and that is just the way they do it there. I decided to have a little bit. About 1/2 cup, with about 1/4 cup of meat sauce. It was the best pencil points I ever ate! (Pencil points is like a penne type of pasta, it's THE thing in Trenton, NJ) I was glad I'd decided to have some. The main course was veal parm and chicken cacciatore. I skipped the veal and went with the chicken. A thigh and a leg, about 3 ounces total. And some green beans that seemed to be cooked in olive oil with maybe some butter--agian more fat that I'd have used, but I needed the extra so it was fine. The chicken was moist and tender. There were cookies for dessert--Pepperidge Farm, which I love. I felt no desire to have any. I came home, plugged it all into Spark People, and it turns out I did PERFECT!!! With a little snack tonite, including my protein bolus, I'm right on target on all nutrients for the day!
I'm glad to know that I can go out in the "real world" and eat, and make good choices and stay within the parameters I need to be in. It proves that this is a lifestyle change that I can live with. I'll be more precise at home, and when I'm "out there" I'll do the best I can, and it will all work out fine.
I also got to wear some of my old "skinny clothes"--it was cool and grey today, so I needed something warmer, and it worked out fine. Not likely I'll ever wear them again, so I'm glad I had the chance.
Now I'll spend the rest of the weekend taking it VERY easy, just sitting quietly and letting my tummy rest. I feel fine, just tired. Hopefully I'll get a good report from the doctor on Monday, and things will be healing well. I didn't overdo today, I was very careful. I felt it went well, and I'm just so glad for the chance to go.
April 29, 2008 What A Difference A Little Dairy Makes!
I can't believe it's been a week since I last wrote here. Time just flies by!
I've been slowly adding back a little dairy. Cottage cheese one day, some yogurt the next, a little cheddar cheese here and there. It really does make a difference, some in good ways, some not so good.The pros: more protein! more variety! Cheese!!The cons: stinky gas. post nasal drip.
I would never have believed that a little dairy could really affect me this much, but it seems it DOES. So now the question is, "is it worth it"? At this point, I would have to say YES. Just having that cottage cheese or yogurt makes such a difference in my diet. It gives me easy, yummy, digestable protein. It gives me flavor. I ENJOY it. The gas, I don't care about. And frankly, the post nasal drip COULD be from seasonal allergies, rather than the dairy, but who knows? But I'll deal with it, at least for now. I certainly won't go crazy with the dairy, but I feel like this is a good compromise.
I started eating Cheerios every few days. There's some wheat in there, so it's the first wheat in 2.5 months. So far, so good. Again, I'm not in a hurry to add in alot of wheat. But I sure do love my Cheerios!
The scale stayed the same this week, which is OK. I just hope it doesn't go UP in the next few weeks when I can't exercise. 5 days of lying in bed is NOT going to burn alot of calories! I may need to drop my calories a bit, maybe 1300-1400 instead of 1400-1600. Just until I can go back to the gym. Which can't be soon enough for me!!
I'm about as ready for surgery as I can be. I've cooked up a storm, making things for me to eat over the next several weeks--chili, rice and beans, tortilla soup. I have plenty of veggie and turkey sauce, some veggie and beef sauce, and I'm going to make a big pot of rice tomorrow. I bought lots of fresh fruits and veggies. I stocked up on almond milk, and got a bunch of rice (possible rationing coming...) I will bring a cooler to the hospital with some fresh fruit, baby carrots, cottage cheese, protein boluses, and some granola, nuts, and raisins. That should help alot, since hospital food is not known for being either tasty or healthy.
I don't know how much I'll be able to be on the computer while I'm in bed. I don't have to lie completely flat, but I can't sit up all the way either. Not sure if I can hold the laptop well enough to read and type, but we'll see. In the meantime, there are plenty of DVDs to watch, and books to read. I'm sure the time will pass fairly quickly, and by next week hopefully I'll be allowed to sit up in my chair again. If not, I am gonna be SOOOO bored!
I went out and bought a few elastic waist pants and capris for the coming weeks. Since all the elastics I had were huge on me and falling off, I needed to replace them. I figure I can use the capris for the gym afterwards--they have drawstrings, so I can wear them until they are baggy. I don't plan on buying anything else for a long time--not until we go to Talbots at the end of June to get stuff for vacation.
Strange. I've had 210 as my goal for the longest time. But since I saw Dr. Westrich, and he said my knees are the same as the ones they put in a little old lady, I'm feeling like maybe I need to lose more. I know I'm never gonna see 150, but maybe 180-190? It would have to be maintainable of course. But I think when I get to 210, I'm not going to change my diet or my exercise. I'll just keep going and see where my body takes me. And wherever that is, that's where I'll be. Sorta profound. The only thing I worry about is that if I lose more than I'd planned, my kilt will be too big. Well, I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it!
I've been slowly adding back a little dairy. Cottage cheese one day, some yogurt the next, a little cheddar cheese here and there. It really does make a difference, some in good ways, some not so good.The pros: more protein! more variety! Cheese!!The cons: stinky gas. post nasal drip.
I would never have believed that a little dairy could really affect me this much, but it seems it DOES. So now the question is, "is it worth it"? At this point, I would have to say YES. Just having that cottage cheese or yogurt makes such a difference in my diet. It gives me easy, yummy, digestable protein. It gives me flavor. I ENJOY it. The gas, I don't care about. And frankly, the post nasal drip COULD be from seasonal allergies, rather than the dairy, but who knows? But I'll deal with it, at least for now. I certainly won't go crazy with the dairy, but I feel like this is a good compromise.
I started eating Cheerios every few days. There's some wheat in there, so it's the first wheat in 2.5 months. So far, so good. Again, I'm not in a hurry to add in alot of wheat. But I sure do love my Cheerios!
The scale stayed the same this week, which is OK. I just hope it doesn't go UP in the next few weeks when I can't exercise. 5 days of lying in bed is NOT going to burn alot of calories! I may need to drop my calories a bit, maybe 1300-1400 instead of 1400-1600. Just until I can go back to the gym. Which can't be soon enough for me!!
I'm about as ready for surgery as I can be. I've cooked up a storm, making things for me to eat over the next several weeks--chili, rice and beans, tortilla soup. I have plenty of veggie and turkey sauce, some veggie and beef sauce, and I'm going to make a big pot of rice tomorrow. I bought lots of fresh fruits and veggies. I stocked up on almond milk, and got a bunch of rice (possible rationing coming...) I will bring a cooler to the hospital with some fresh fruit, baby carrots, cottage cheese, protein boluses, and some granola, nuts, and raisins. That should help alot, since hospital food is not known for being either tasty or healthy.
I don't know how much I'll be able to be on the computer while I'm in bed. I don't have to lie completely flat, but I can't sit up all the way either. Not sure if I can hold the laptop well enough to read and type, but we'll see. In the meantime, there are plenty of DVDs to watch, and books to read. I'm sure the time will pass fairly quickly, and by next week hopefully I'll be allowed to sit up in my chair again. If not, I am gonna be SOOOO bored!
I went out and bought a few elastic waist pants and capris for the coming weeks. Since all the elastics I had were huge on me and falling off, I needed to replace them. I figure I can use the capris for the gym afterwards--they have drawstrings, so I can wear them until they are baggy. I don't plan on buying anything else for a long time--not until we go to Talbots at the end of June to get stuff for vacation.
Strange. I've had 210 as my goal for the longest time. But since I saw Dr. Westrich, and he said my knees are the same as the ones they put in a little old lady, I'm feeling like maybe I need to lose more. I know I'm never gonna see 150, but maybe 180-190? It would have to be maintainable of course. But I think when I get to 210, I'm not going to change my diet or my exercise. I'll just keep going and see where my body takes me. And wherever that is, that's where I'll be. Sorta profound. The only thing I worry about is that if I lose more than I'd planned, my kilt will be too big. Well, I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it!
April 22, 2008 Photographic Evidence
A few days ago, I dug out the scrapbook I had started when I had my WLS. It shows me at my heaviest, and then shows the progression as I lost weight. But it stops at the point where I'm down 236#, to 250. Which is HIGHER than I am now! There were a few photos stuffed in there but not actually "scrapped". So I decided it was time for an update. I went through my pictures from the past 5 years or so, and printed out the ones I wanted to use. And then tonite, for some reason, I decided to put it all together.
So now my scrapbook covers my entire 250# loss, as well as the 50# gain that followed. I realized that the picture that started it all was the one from Disney this past November. I saw that picture and realized I was out of control. I had gained back 20% of the weight I'd lost--that's 50 pounds! I decided then and there to do something about it. So I put that in, along with the picture of me from last week in the dress I wore in Turkey in 2004, when I was at my lowest post-op weight. And I could REALLY see the difference between the 2 pictures.
It all got me thinking. I have so many pictures of all the trips we've taken, places we've seen, people we've met, special occasions, etc. etc, etc. But I have very few pictures of ME. OK, a good part of that is that I'm the one holding the camera 90% of the time. But I COULD have someone take a picture of me, too. I just choose not to, becuase I hate how I look in pictures. I think that needs to change. So, this summer, when I am on vacation with my family, I will make sure to be on the OTHER side of the camera sometimes, so that I can be IN the pictures. And in Scotland? Lets just say that there will be pictures of me WITH the hot guys in kilts! THAT should make for an interesting page in that scrapbook!
The scale was down again today, 3.4 pounds. So I am only 6 pounds above my lowest. I figured out that if I lose just 1-1.5 pounds a week from now on, I will reach my goal of 210 sometime between Labor Day and Christmas. Of course, this doesn't allow for vacations and surgeries, which will certainly impact the weight loss somewhat. But at least I know I WILL get there. Somehow, "I want to lose 32 pounds" sounds soooo much better than "I have to lose 70 pounds". Amazingly, I'm more than halfway there!
60 minutes on the elliptical today--it was easy. As in, really, truly, EASY. Sure, I was sweating like crazy, but it was not like I was struggling to finish. It's hard to believe that just 3 short months ago I struggled to do 15 minutes. And who would have EVER thought I'd actually enjoy exercise?!?The changes are dramatic and exciting. And I have the photographic evidence to prove it!
So now my scrapbook covers my entire 250# loss, as well as the 50# gain that followed. I realized that the picture that started it all was the one from Disney this past November. I saw that picture and realized I was out of control. I had gained back 20% of the weight I'd lost--that's 50 pounds! I decided then and there to do something about it. So I put that in, along with the picture of me from last week in the dress I wore in Turkey in 2004, when I was at my lowest post-op weight. And I could REALLY see the difference between the 2 pictures.
It all got me thinking. I have so many pictures of all the trips we've taken, places we've seen, people we've met, special occasions, etc. etc, etc. But I have very few pictures of ME. OK, a good part of that is that I'm the one holding the camera 90% of the time. But I COULD have someone take a picture of me, too. I just choose not to, becuase I hate how I look in pictures. I think that needs to change. So, this summer, when I am on vacation with my family, I will make sure to be on the OTHER side of the camera sometimes, so that I can be IN the pictures. And in Scotland? Lets just say that there will be pictures of me WITH the hot guys in kilts! THAT should make for an interesting page in that scrapbook!
The scale was down again today, 3.4 pounds. So I am only 6 pounds above my lowest. I figured out that if I lose just 1-1.5 pounds a week from now on, I will reach my goal of 210 sometime between Labor Day and Christmas. Of course, this doesn't allow for vacations and surgeries, which will certainly impact the weight loss somewhat. But at least I know I WILL get there. Somehow, "I want to lose 32 pounds" sounds soooo much better than "I have to lose 70 pounds". Amazingly, I'm more than halfway there!
60 minutes on the elliptical today--it was easy. As in, really, truly, EASY. Sure, I was sweating like crazy, but it was not like I was struggling to finish. It's hard to believe that just 3 short months ago I struggled to do 15 minutes. And who would have EVER thought I'd actually enjoy exercise?!?The changes are dramatic and exciting. And I have the photographic evidence to prove it!
April 20, 2008 My Weekend In The Real World
Well, Laura needed new clothes. Desperately. So, with Danny safely packed off for a weekend of testosterone bonding with Daddy and Uncle Billy, we girls headed to that beacon that calls to females of all ages--the mall. Now, I should insert a disclaimer here that I am almost ALWAYS immune to this beacon, and I HATE the mall. But necessity called, so off we went.
Yesterday we started at Charlotte Russe. I saw some cute possibilities, but Laura wanted nothing to do with them. She hated everything. I have to agree for the most part--the clothes for junior girls these days are just plain UGLY! We left with 2 turquoise Tshirts. $12 off the $50 gift card. Did only slightly better at Limited Too, crowded in among the elementary school "I wanna be a sexy mama" set. What are these people THINKING?? We found a few pairs of shorts that weren't short--the bermuda style, which is all Laura will wear (thank God!), and a couple shirts to go with. $85. Off to Old Navy. One pair of shorts, one shirt, one gift card used. Total cost to me, $1.50. Now, as tiring as this shopping was, our next stop was the hardest for me. Ruby Tuesdays. For dinner. I don't DO dinner out very often becuase it's just too hard. But I decided to give it my best shot--I was too tired to cook, so there we were. I ended up having salmon (no lemon butter please, just the lemon) with green beans and a baked potato. With BUTTER!!!! Yummy, yummy butter, how I have missed you! Only a small amount, but such a BIG taste! And I did so well, when I came home and entered the meal into my food tracker, all my values lined up PERFECTLY!!! Hmmm, maybe this isn't so bad after all....
Today, following Laura's first golf lesson, which had me standing in the cold for an hour, we headed back to the mall. Two days in a row? I don't think I've been there 2 days in the last YEAR! But JCPenney was having a BIG sale, and we needed clothes!! Our first stop was the "big girls" department, since Mom needed a few shirts. Found 2 nice blouse type ones--just a bit nicer than the usual tshirts. Off to the Junior department, where, wonder of wonders, I actually got Laura to try on a couple of dresses!!! Now, this is the kid who thinks formal wear means clean jeans and a t-shirt without a slogan on it! Well, lets just say that MY itty bitty girl does NOT have itty bitty "girls". And the dresses for juniors are just a LITTLE bit too, um, revealing, for my 12 year old. So no new dress--she'll stick with the one she has. But we found a couple of cute shirts. Then it was up to the girls department for shorts, since the juniors only goes down to 3 or 5, and she's a 0 or 1 (BRAT!!!) We found her 3 pair of bermuda style denim shorts, and 2 pair of denim capris. Very cute. Oh, and 2 new pair of "sun shades" as she calls them, to protect those baby blues. And 4 new bras, which I LOVE becuase they are B cups WITHOUT padding! And I think the next set of bras may need to be, oh dear God it can't be, C cups. How on earth does my 84 pound daughter need C cups? *I* wear a C cup! I weigh 245 pounds--I outweigh her by 160 pounds! And we both need a C cup bra? What is this world coming to????
Anyway, it was a good day to shop at JCPenney, because I got $423 worth of stuff for only $135. 20% off everything, plus buy one, get one for 88 cents, plus $65 in gift cards, and that's all that was left!! Not too shabby!
So again, I'm tired. I really don't feel like cooking. And I get the puppy eyes and the "pleeeeeeeeeeeeease Mommy?????" So off we go to the Longhorn Steakhouse. Now I'd done my research and knew what I was getting. The 7 ounce filet (I only ate 4 oz), with a salad and baked potato. A little balsamic viniagrette on the side, some butter on the potato, and I was in heaven. I DID take 2 bites of the hot, fresh bread (honey wheat?) that was delievered to the table. It was soooooooooooooo good! Laura ate her piece, and didn't want any more, so I asked the waitress to remove it. Once again, I came home, logged the food into my tracker, and the levels were all right on! WOW! I survived TWO dinners out in one weekend without doing any damage! PLUS I did all this lovely mall walking and carrying of clothes and bags. Not a bad workout for an "off" day. I guess what all of this has shown me is that I CAN survive in the "real world" of restuarants and shopping and the stuff that "regular" people do all the time. I don't have to hide in my house where all the food is "safe" and everything is carefully planned ahead. Why? Becuase I've learned so well how to do it, that now I can safely take it out in the world and do it well there too!! All of a sudden, that summer vacation doesn't look quite so scary. And a few more shopping days like this, closer to the summer, will have me dressed and ready to go!
Yesterday we started at Charlotte Russe. I saw some cute possibilities, but Laura wanted nothing to do with them. She hated everything. I have to agree for the most part--the clothes for junior girls these days are just plain UGLY! We left with 2 turquoise Tshirts. $12 off the $50 gift card. Did only slightly better at Limited Too, crowded in among the elementary school "I wanna be a sexy mama" set. What are these people THINKING?? We found a few pairs of shorts that weren't short--the bermuda style, which is all Laura will wear (thank God!), and a couple shirts to go with. $85. Off to Old Navy. One pair of shorts, one shirt, one gift card used. Total cost to me, $1.50. Now, as tiring as this shopping was, our next stop was the hardest for me. Ruby Tuesdays. For dinner. I don't DO dinner out very often becuase it's just too hard. But I decided to give it my best shot--I was too tired to cook, so there we were. I ended up having salmon (no lemon butter please, just the lemon) with green beans and a baked potato. With BUTTER!!!! Yummy, yummy butter, how I have missed you! Only a small amount, but such a BIG taste! And I did so well, when I came home and entered the meal into my food tracker, all my values lined up PERFECTLY!!! Hmmm, maybe this isn't so bad after all....
Today, following Laura's first golf lesson, which had me standing in the cold for an hour, we headed back to the mall. Two days in a row? I don't think I've been there 2 days in the last YEAR! But JCPenney was having a BIG sale, and we needed clothes!! Our first stop was the "big girls" department, since Mom needed a few shirts. Found 2 nice blouse type ones--just a bit nicer than the usual tshirts. Off to the Junior department, where, wonder of wonders, I actually got Laura to try on a couple of dresses!!! Now, this is the kid who thinks formal wear means clean jeans and a t-shirt without a slogan on it! Well, lets just say that MY itty bitty girl does NOT have itty bitty "girls". And the dresses for juniors are just a LITTLE bit too, um, revealing, for my 12 year old. So no new dress--she'll stick with the one she has. But we found a couple of cute shirts. Then it was up to the girls department for shorts, since the juniors only goes down to 3 or 5, and she's a 0 or 1 (BRAT!!!) We found her 3 pair of bermuda style denim shorts, and 2 pair of denim capris. Very cute. Oh, and 2 new pair of "sun shades" as she calls them, to protect those baby blues. And 4 new bras, which I LOVE becuase they are B cups WITHOUT padding! And I think the next set of bras may need to be, oh dear God it can't be, C cups. How on earth does my 84 pound daughter need C cups? *I* wear a C cup! I weigh 245 pounds--I outweigh her by 160 pounds! And we both need a C cup bra? What is this world coming to????
Anyway, it was a good day to shop at JCPenney, because I got $423 worth of stuff for only $135. 20% off everything, plus buy one, get one for 88 cents, plus $65 in gift cards, and that's all that was left!! Not too shabby!
So again, I'm tired. I really don't feel like cooking. And I get the puppy eyes and the "pleeeeeeeeeeeeease Mommy?????" So off we go to the Longhorn Steakhouse. Now I'd done my research and knew what I was getting. The 7 ounce filet (I only ate 4 oz), with a salad and baked potato. A little balsamic viniagrette on the side, some butter on the potato, and I was in heaven. I DID take 2 bites of the hot, fresh bread (honey wheat?) that was delievered to the table. It was soooooooooooooo good! Laura ate her piece, and didn't want any more, so I asked the waitress to remove it. Once again, I came home, logged the food into my tracker, and the levels were all right on! WOW! I survived TWO dinners out in one weekend without doing any damage! PLUS I did all this lovely mall walking and carrying of clothes and bags. Not a bad workout for an "off" day. I guess what all of this has shown me is that I CAN survive in the "real world" of restuarants and shopping and the stuff that "regular" people do all the time. I don't have to hide in my house where all the food is "safe" and everything is carefully planned ahead. Why? Becuase I've learned so well how to do it, that now I can safely take it out in the world and do it well there too!! All of a sudden, that summer vacation doesn't look quite so scary. And a few more shopping days like this, closer to the summer, will have me dressed and ready to go!
April 18, 2008 The Red Dress
I found a beautiful red dress in the Talbots catalog. Every time I looked at the catalog, I was drawn to this dress. If only I could have this dress. But, alas, the dresses only come in Misses sizes, and I'm a 20W. But then, I found I could fit into some 18W stuff, and 18W pretty much equals 20 Misses. So I ordered the dress. Maybe it would fit, maybe not. And maybe I could wear it for vacation this summer.
Well, the red dress arrived today. I immediately stopped what I was doing and went to put it on. And guess what? It's um, a little bit too....big! I mean, if I wasn't in a losing phase, I'd probably say it was OK, but, it's a bit loose, and since I AM losing, no way was it gonna work. But I thought it looked very nice on me anyway, albeit a good bit too long. So I figured, I'll send it back and get an 18. But, wait, that would fit me now, what if even THAT is too big come July? So then I thought, to heck with the 20% off, I'll send it back, and wait to the end of June, and then get whatever size I am at that time. Who knows, maybe I'll be able to get away with a 16 by then, and I could get a 16 petite, which would eliminate the too long issue. OK, all set, problem solved.
Or so I thought. When we got home tonite, I told Laura I needed her to take my picture in the dress so I could post it. So, I put on the dress, admired it in the mirror, smiled as she told me how pretty I looked. And she took the picture. Actually 3 of them. Each one worse than the one before it. It looks HORRIBLE! I look like a big, fat red blob! Why, when this dress fits me like it does, and I thought it looked so nice in the mirror, and I was so pleased, does the photo show a different story? I look NOTHING like the picture in the catalog.
OK, I know what you're thinking--umm, Wendy, you're not a size 4, so of course you look different. But in the mirror, I saw a larger woman who still looked very nice in the dress, and the dress still resembled the one in the catalog, just a bigger version. But photos don't lie, and if that is how the dress really looks on me, it can just go back where it came from and stay there, thank you very much.
So, I've thought about this. Was it just the photo? Nope, took a picture of me yesterday in another dress and I look great. So, maybe it's the dress. Maybe it just isn't the right dress for me. And hey, the whole thing with the dress was, "could I possibly fit into this size 20 Misses dress?" And I got my answer--YES!!! I CAN!!! So, that's the saga of the red dress.
Meantime, it was a GORGEOUS day today--well into the 80s. I went into my closet to shop for a short sleeved shirt to go with the denim capris I found yesterday. Hmmmm, we seem to have a problem. In my entire closet and drawers, I could find only ONE short sleeved shirt that fits. Lots of sleeveless. Lots of long sleeved. But only ONE short sleeved. Well, this will just not do. So tonite while the kids were at cooking school, I headed to Kohls to remedy the situation. And, after opening a Kohls charge (which makes sense now since that's where 80% of Laura's clothing comes from these days) and saving 20%, I ended up with 10 new shirts for only $97.00!!! NOT TOO SHABBY!!! Most of them were $8.99, but there were 2 that were over $20 each before the discount. Anyway, I coordinated shirts to my print capris that needed them, and then got some stripes and solids to go with my denim and khaki capris and pants. So i am set for the next several months. Oh, and the shirts were almost all size 1X. Not bad, since the last time I shopped I had to get all 3X.
Who needs that red dress anyway??????
Well, the red dress arrived today. I immediately stopped what I was doing and went to put it on. And guess what? It's um, a little bit too....big! I mean, if I wasn't in a losing phase, I'd probably say it was OK, but, it's a bit loose, and since I AM losing, no way was it gonna work. But I thought it looked very nice on me anyway, albeit a good bit too long. So I figured, I'll send it back and get an 18. But, wait, that would fit me now, what if even THAT is too big come July? So then I thought, to heck with the 20% off, I'll send it back, and wait to the end of June, and then get whatever size I am at that time. Who knows, maybe I'll be able to get away with a 16 by then, and I could get a 16 petite, which would eliminate the too long issue. OK, all set, problem solved.
Or so I thought. When we got home tonite, I told Laura I needed her to take my picture in the dress so I could post it. So, I put on the dress, admired it in the mirror, smiled as she told me how pretty I looked. And she took the picture. Actually 3 of them. Each one worse than the one before it. It looks HORRIBLE! I look like a big, fat red blob! Why, when this dress fits me like it does, and I thought it looked so nice in the mirror, and I was so pleased, does the photo show a different story? I look NOTHING like the picture in the catalog.
OK, I know what you're thinking--umm, Wendy, you're not a size 4, so of course you look different. But in the mirror, I saw a larger woman who still looked very nice in the dress, and the dress still resembled the one in the catalog, just a bigger version. But photos don't lie, and if that is how the dress really looks on me, it can just go back where it came from and stay there, thank you very much.
So, I've thought about this. Was it just the photo? Nope, took a picture of me yesterday in another dress and I look great. So, maybe it's the dress. Maybe it just isn't the right dress for me. And hey, the whole thing with the dress was, "could I possibly fit into this size 20 Misses dress?" And I got my answer--YES!!! I CAN!!! So, that's the saga of the red dress.
Meantime, it was a GORGEOUS day today--well into the 80s. I went into my closet to shop for a short sleeved shirt to go with the denim capris I found yesterday. Hmmmm, we seem to have a problem. In my entire closet and drawers, I could find only ONE short sleeved shirt that fits. Lots of sleeveless. Lots of long sleeved. But only ONE short sleeved. Well, this will just not do. So tonite while the kids were at cooking school, I headed to Kohls to remedy the situation. And, after opening a Kohls charge (which makes sense now since that's where 80% of Laura's clothing comes from these days) and saving 20%, I ended up with 10 new shirts for only $97.00!!! NOT TOO SHABBY!!! Most of them were $8.99, but there were 2 that were over $20 each before the discount. Anyway, I coordinated shirts to my print capris that needed them, and then got some stripes and solids to go with my denim and khaki capris and pants. So i am set for the next several months. Oh, and the shirts were almost all size 1X. Not bad, since the last time I shopped I had to get all 3X.
Who needs that red dress anyway??????
April 16, 2008 The Joy of Cottage Cheese
Yup, that's right! I had cottage cheese for breakfast. It was SOOOOO good! I felt like I'd died and gone to heaven! I savored every delicious bite. And I've had NO problems from it. Also for breakfast, I tried a new SparkPeople recipe for CousCous Pudding. I mixed barley couscous, almond milk, raisins, sugar, vanilla and cinnamon, along with fiber powder. I mixed in some flaxseed when it was done, and it was really good! So I have enough for 3 days, then I'll do an oatmeal rotation, and maybe some cornmeal porridge, before coming back to this.The protein boluses are going well. My protein has been up over 90 for the past few days with NO problems! I'm also eating more beans--lentil soup for lunch yesterday and today, tomorrow night I'm making tortilla soup with black beans. And, strangely, the lack of a PM snack has not bothered me at all--it just makes me ready for breakfast when I get up in the AM.
Today I went shopping in my closet again. I think it's my new favorite sport! I found many things are already too big, several are just right (including my favorite winter wool slacks, which are useless to me now in mid-April), and some are close to fitting! I guess this weekend it will be time to do a complete inventory. I was able to put on a dress I last wore in Turkey 3.5 years ago--it looks so nice, fits great! Also I have 2 dressy pantsuits that will be great for dinners on the cruise this summer (assuming they aren't too too big by then). Meanwhile, I'm wearing another pair of Talbots pants today--these are a 20W, but just as small as the 18W ones, so I'm happy about it. They are a bit wintery, so I may not wear them again, but I wore them today!
It's weird. I am starting to feel small again. Not just thinner. Small. As in, I'm a small person now. I feel it when I get in my car and there is so much room between me and the steering wheel. I feel it when I am walking very fast to get somewhere in a hurry and I can do it without getting winded. I feel it when I am getting dressed and clothes just slide right on without feeling tight. Mostly in the car, I think. Weird.
I pulled out my WLS scrapbook. The thinnest I am in there is 250#. I picked out some pictures to print and add to it showing me at 236ish, and then going up through the years. And then the one of me today in the dress. And when the Talbots red dress comes, one of me in that too. Then, on May 14, my 7 year WLS anniversary, I'll do a couple doorway shots and stuff. I mean, I'm losng again, I may as well complete the story, right?
The scale this week was down 2.4 pounds. But the big thing was the measurements. Since March 8 (maybe 6 weeks) I have lost 2.5" in my waist, and I think 4" in my hips! WOW!!! That's why clothes I tried on then that didn't fit, fit well now. And yes, the weight loss has been significant in that time period too. About 18#. I know it's over 30 since New Years, which is awesome! Only 35 to go, and I know I can do it. I watched Bob and Laura eat candy tonite, and I just can't imagine it. I honestly don't think I could stomach it. Maybe, someday, a little Hershey's Kiss, but that's about it. I honestly have no desire, no interest. That's a GOOD thing!
Today I went shopping in my closet again. I think it's my new favorite sport! I found many things are already too big, several are just right (including my favorite winter wool slacks, which are useless to me now in mid-April), and some are close to fitting! I guess this weekend it will be time to do a complete inventory. I was able to put on a dress I last wore in Turkey 3.5 years ago--it looks so nice, fits great! Also I have 2 dressy pantsuits that will be great for dinners on the cruise this summer (assuming they aren't too too big by then). Meanwhile, I'm wearing another pair of Talbots pants today--these are a 20W, but just as small as the 18W ones, so I'm happy about it. They are a bit wintery, so I may not wear them again, but I wore them today!
It's weird. I am starting to feel small again. Not just thinner. Small. As in, I'm a small person now. I feel it when I get in my car and there is so much room between me and the steering wheel. I feel it when I am walking very fast to get somewhere in a hurry and I can do it without getting winded. I feel it when I am getting dressed and clothes just slide right on without feeling tight. Mostly in the car, I think. Weird.
I pulled out my WLS scrapbook. The thinnest I am in there is 250#. I picked out some pictures to print and add to it showing me at 236ish, and then going up through the years. And then the one of me today in the dress. And when the Talbots red dress comes, one of me in that too. Then, on May 14, my 7 year WLS anniversary, I'll do a couple doorway shots and stuff. I mean, I'm losng again, I may as well complete the story, right?
The scale this week was down 2.4 pounds. But the big thing was the measurements. Since March 8 (maybe 6 weeks) I have lost 2.5" in my waist, and I think 4" in my hips! WOW!!! That's why clothes I tried on then that didn't fit, fit well now. And yes, the weight loss has been significant in that time period too. About 18#. I know it's over 30 since New Years, which is awesome! Only 35 to go, and I know I can do it. I watched Bob and Laura eat candy tonite, and I just can't imagine it. I honestly don't think I could stomach it. Maybe, someday, a little Hershey's Kiss, but that's about it. I honestly have no desire, no interest. That's a GOOD thing!
April 14, 2008 Out On Parole, And Shopping In My Closet
So, the good news is that after 2.5 months, I can start slowly reintroducing dairy and wheat back into my diet! The first thing? Whey protein boluses. I bought them today at Vitamin Shoppe. It tastes like concentrated KoolAid--waaaayyyyy too sweet. But only 1.5 ounces? I can do that. AND it packs 21 grams of protein in that little drink! And it's surprisingly filling. So we'll see how that sits for a few days, and then try a little something else? Cheese? Yogurt? No, I know. COTTAGE CHEESE!! The thing I've missed the most! Anyway, I feel like I've been released on parole--just to see how things go, but I have to keep checking in with my parole officer (the nutritionist) on a regular basis.
The other big news is that after the gym today, I decided to look through some of my "thin clothes" in the closet for something to wear. The pants I've been wearing are just too darned big anymore. So I was looking through, trying to find something that wasn't too winter-looking (ie, wool pants...) and I found a pair of red and black pants from Talbots. I thought, "hmmm, maybe", but then realized they were size 18W. Not gonna happen. So I decided to see just how close to fitting they would be--could I even get them ON? And guess what? They fit! I actually wore them today! I feel like a fashion model or something, in my "skinny pants".
So then, I got to thinking. There's this red dress from Talbots that I've been drooling over. Only problem is, it comes in Misses sizes to 20, but not Women's sizes. Well, hmmm, an 18W and a Misses 20 have pretty much the same measurements...Maybe? Possibly? By July? I mean, at $138 the dress is too pricey for a 'someday"-hang-in-the-closet thing. But maybe by June it would be worth trying? And then I got the mail. And in the mail was a coupon, from Talbots, for 20% off. Which makes the dress only about $110. Which is still alot, but the coupon is only good for 2 weeks, so I would have to get it NOW. So I decided, this is meant to be. And I cut out the picture to put on my fridge, and I'm ordering the dress tonite. And I can't WAIT 'til it comes and I can try it on and dream of how I'll look wearing it in Scotland. In just 104 days!
In other news, skin graft surgery is scheduled for May 1, and I should be able to come home the next day, or 2 days max. Why, I don't know. But this beats the heck out of 5 days! This makes things a whole lot easier. By God's grace, I may have an intact abdomen by Mothers Day! (Please, please!!)
Danny's behavior has gone from bad to worse. I'd finally had enough and threatened boarding school. Turns out there is a school in NC that would be perfect for him. I'm keeping it as an option. He got very upset and promised to do better, and he was an angel this AM and before dinner, but since dinner he has been as obnoxious and disobedient as ever. I told him the choices were his, and that if he makes poor choices, the consequences will not be pleasant. As of now, he has nothing. No priviledges. No toys. No activities. Guitar lessons are gone. Cooking school is gone. Video games confiscated. Room cleaned out of everything except clothes and books. And he can get it ALL back. But he has to choose to do the right thing, and he doesn't seem to care enough about it to make that choice. In the meanwhile, I am not going to let him push me around anymore. I'll just leave the room. He can yell all he wants at an empty room. And when he doesn't get any of the things he wants, he will eventually have to face the fact that HE chose not to get it, by his behavior.
Thank God for Prozac, or I'd be on a cliff right about now. But I will be strong, and I will do my part, and if we end up going on vacation without him, maybe THAT will be a wakeup call. Probably not. But at least we will be able to enjoy our vacation! Hey--I can always send him to camp for 6 weeks instead of 3...Amazingly, through all the upheaval, I have not turned to food. June asked me today what made the difference this time. I think it was a combination. The impetus came from "I'm going to Scotland and I'm going to be in shape" at the beginning of January. 2 weeks later, my stay at Canyon Ranch had a major impact. And 2 weeks after that, eliminating so many foods. There's a HUGE difference between "I can't eat that, it will make me fat" and "I can't eat that, it will make my sinuses crazy and my eczema itchy and I'll feel like garbage'. Just a completely different perspective. And you know what? I don't WANT to go back to feeling the way I used to. I never realized how bad I felt until I felt better. I LIKE the way I feel now. So why on earth would I CHOOSE to put something in my mouth that I know would change that?
It will be interesting to see how this goes, this re-introducing the eliminated foods. Slow going, for sure. I have to watch the symptoms closely to see if any return.But the main point here is that I am healtheir than I've been in as long as I can remember. I'm healing, at long last. AND I just happen to have lost about 40 pounds in the meantime. Nice side effect, huh?
The other big news is that after the gym today, I decided to look through some of my "thin clothes" in the closet for something to wear. The pants I've been wearing are just too darned big anymore. So I was looking through, trying to find something that wasn't too winter-looking (ie, wool pants...) and I found a pair of red and black pants from Talbots. I thought, "hmmm, maybe", but then realized they were size 18W. Not gonna happen. So I decided to see just how close to fitting they would be--could I even get them ON? And guess what? They fit! I actually wore them today! I feel like a fashion model or something, in my "skinny pants".
So then, I got to thinking. There's this red dress from Talbots that I've been drooling over. Only problem is, it comes in Misses sizes to 20, but not Women's sizes. Well, hmmm, an 18W and a Misses 20 have pretty much the same measurements...Maybe? Possibly? By July? I mean, at $138 the dress is too pricey for a 'someday"-hang-in-the-closet thing. But maybe by June it would be worth trying? And then I got the mail. And in the mail was a coupon, from Talbots, for 20% off. Which makes the dress only about $110. Which is still alot, but the coupon is only good for 2 weeks, so I would have to get it NOW. So I decided, this is meant to be. And I cut out the picture to put on my fridge, and I'm ordering the dress tonite. And I can't WAIT 'til it comes and I can try it on and dream of how I'll look wearing it in Scotland. In just 104 days!
In other news, skin graft surgery is scheduled for May 1, and I should be able to come home the next day, or 2 days max. Why, I don't know. But this beats the heck out of 5 days! This makes things a whole lot easier. By God's grace, I may have an intact abdomen by Mothers Day! (Please, please!!)
Danny's behavior has gone from bad to worse. I'd finally had enough and threatened boarding school. Turns out there is a school in NC that would be perfect for him. I'm keeping it as an option. He got very upset and promised to do better, and he was an angel this AM and before dinner, but since dinner he has been as obnoxious and disobedient as ever. I told him the choices were his, and that if he makes poor choices, the consequences will not be pleasant. As of now, he has nothing. No priviledges. No toys. No activities. Guitar lessons are gone. Cooking school is gone. Video games confiscated. Room cleaned out of everything except clothes and books. And he can get it ALL back. But he has to choose to do the right thing, and he doesn't seem to care enough about it to make that choice. In the meanwhile, I am not going to let him push me around anymore. I'll just leave the room. He can yell all he wants at an empty room. And when he doesn't get any of the things he wants, he will eventually have to face the fact that HE chose not to get it, by his behavior.
Thank God for Prozac, or I'd be on a cliff right about now. But I will be strong, and I will do my part, and if we end up going on vacation without him, maybe THAT will be a wakeup call. Probably not. But at least we will be able to enjoy our vacation! Hey--I can always send him to camp for 6 weeks instead of 3...Amazingly, through all the upheaval, I have not turned to food. June asked me today what made the difference this time. I think it was a combination. The impetus came from "I'm going to Scotland and I'm going to be in shape" at the beginning of January. 2 weeks later, my stay at Canyon Ranch had a major impact. And 2 weeks after that, eliminating so many foods. There's a HUGE difference between "I can't eat that, it will make me fat" and "I can't eat that, it will make my sinuses crazy and my eczema itchy and I'll feel like garbage'. Just a completely different perspective. And you know what? I don't WANT to go back to feeling the way I used to. I never realized how bad I felt until I felt better. I LIKE the way I feel now. So why on earth would I CHOOSE to put something in my mouth that I know would change that?
It will be interesting to see how this goes, this re-introducing the eliminated foods. Slow going, for sure. I have to watch the symptoms closely to see if any return.But the main point here is that I am healtheir than I've been in as long as I can remember. I'm healing, at long last. AND I just happen to have lost about 40 pounds in the meantime. Nice side effect, huh?
April 7, 2008 Hitting The Wall With Food, and The Lab Reports From Hell
I do believe if I have to look at oatmeal, cornmeal porridge, chopped salad, turkey, potatoes, rice, salmon or tuna EVER again, I will just scream. AAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!! I hate food. I hate everything ABOUT food. I hate cooking it. I hate eating it. Most of all, I hate planning for it and THINKING about it. I wish I never had to eat again. Why? This certainly doesn't sound like someone who needs to lose weight. But it is. It's me. And no, I'm not anorexic or anything, where I am AFRAID to eat becuase I think it will make me fat, or anything. I am just TIRED of food, and everything related to it. For the past 2 months, I've eliminated all dairy, wheat, eggs, bananas, most beans, and malt. That's ALOT of foods. What was left was pretty slim pickin's (if you'll pardon the pun). Not only that, I've been downing 47 supplements daily, which has done a great job of filling up my pouch, leaving me un-hungry much of the day. My typical day of food has consisted of: Breakfast--oatmeal or corn porridge made with almond milk, with flaxseed and fiber powder mixed in, chicken or pork sausage (gotta get in that protein), and sometimes a fruit. AM snack--when I was still doing this (I stopped about 2 weeks ago due to lack of hunger and appetite), I was eating 2 ounces of turkey, and a fruit. Now that fruit is at breakfast. Lunch--9 days out of 10, it's been a chopped salad of celery, carrot, yellow pepper and tomato, with either tuna, salmon, shrimp, or chicken, with honey mustard dressing, and either a baked potato, barley or rice with butter, or the occasional treat of organic tortilla chips (one food I actually still enjoy) If I didn't have fruit yet, I have it at lunch. Afternoon snack--also getting uncommon these days for the same reason, an apple and 2T of mixed nuts, Dinner--salmon, chicken, turkey, or beef cooked in some boring manner, some peas or green beans (or a V8), and another starch from the list at lunch. OR, a still-somewhat pleasant option of sauce made from 10 different veggies with turkey, beef, and turkey sausuage, served over rice. Evening snack--granola, the nuts if I didn't have them earlier, and raisins. This is the ONLY meal/snack I still enjoy every day, but it's getting harder and harder to eat becuase I'm really not hungry.
All my life I've been told "don't eat unless you're hungry", "stop eating as soon as you are full", etc. Well, now, I'm concentrating so hard on getting in 90 grams of protein a day, and 25+ grams of fiber a day, and 1400-1600 calories a day (it was 1500-1700 until today...), not to mention the 47 supplements, that I was NEVER hungry, usually stuffed, and totally lacking in appetite.
So, today I went to see a new nutritionist. She is my new best friend. For starters, she eliminated most of my supplements, changed a few, and kept a few. Many were changed from huge horse pills to chewables, that can actually be absorbed in my pounch, rather than going right down the toilet. I haven't done the new count yet, but I know it's alot better, and since many of the ones I still have are chewable or sublingual, they won't take up any space. Next, she gave me a TON of ideas for foods. She also convinced me to try soy protein powder. I am not making any promises, becuase when I've tried it before I hated it, and my tummy has never been a big fan of soy. But she gave me a smoothie recipe I am willing to try, with soy powder, almond milk, blueberries, pineapple, and ice. Who knows, I might almost like it. And if not, it's 8-10 ounces, and I can drink that right up (or down...) She also gave me other guidelines, like which supplements to take with others, or away from others. I have to get 90 grams of protein daily. Well, the smoothie would give me 26. I can't drink while I eat. I knew that, but what are you gonna do when you have a big handful of supplements to take? So, now I'll take the few remaining ones 30 minutes AFTER I eat.
I called the doctor up at Canyon Ranch to schedule a consult with him about the changes, my new labs, and the hope of resuming at least SOME dairy and wheat. He is away all this week, but I will talk to him next Monday. My labs are a mess. For some odd reason (idiocy, perhaps?), my friends at LabCorp ran DOUBLE tests on several things. I had 2 doctors prescriptions, and there were some overlaps (one from my PCP, one from my bariatric surgeon). So what do they do? They run 2 CBCs, 2 Vitamin D levels, etc. And I'm willing to bet that my lovely HMO is not gonna pay for those! Great, just what I need. Anyway, some test I never heard of is giving me dire warnings that if my levels stay low for 3 months it means I have CKD. Huh? What's CKD? Only thing I can think of is Chronic Kidney Disease, and my kidneys are just fine, thank you very much. My iron saturation is so low that they put an ALERT message on it. This is after 3 or 4 IV iron infusions. Guess I'll be getting some more of those... Oh, and one Vitamin D level is only 2/3 of the low end of normal, while the other is at the high end of normal. From the same blood, the same day, the same time. If my labs are to be believed, I should probably expect to be dead within days. Of course, I don't necessarily believe them. I mean, they reported one blood glucose as 85 (which is about right for me), and the other as 107, which is high enough to concern anyone regarding insulin resistance, diabetes, etc. Well, duh, turns out the 107 was drawn the next day at the hematologist's office, NON FASTING, so it's normal, but it was listed as a fasting glucose.
In other news, I got the name and number of an orthopedist at the Hospital for Special Surgery in NYC. He specializes in knee replacements, specifically complicated cases and difficult revisions. Umm, yeah, that would be me. So I'll call him tomorrow and see when I can get in to see him. I rescheduled my CT scan too. I'm going Thursday, with or without approval from my HMO. I may have to pay for it out of pocket (and it's not cheap), but darn it, I need this test, and I'm going to have it! I'll fight them for the money later. (I mean seriously, what moron declines a CT scan for someone in my situation?) I wish to God I could find different insurance that wasn't insanely expensive. (yeah, me and how many million other Americans?) So, anyway, tomorrow is scale day. I have no idea what to expect. I've been feeling thinner, which means I will probably gain 3 pounds. I know, that makes no sense, but it's usually how it goes. Also, with 3 straight weeks of 4 pound losses, I'm due for a letdown. Not being a pessimist here, just a realist. And really, it's a number. Nothing more. I KNOW I'm doing the right things. One small (?) concern I do have is that yesterday when I was walking around the camp where I'd taken my daughter for an interview, we were going up some hills, and I got very tired, and more than a bit winded. This is not usual for me. Granted, neither is climbing hills, but still, I don't get winded at the gym when I'm working out for 45 minutes or more, why would a short walk up the hill be so hard? I wonder if it's related to my low hemoglobin (which shows the oxygen carrying ability of the red blood cells). Could be. Just want to be sure it isn't related to the sky high cardiac CRP levels I'm showing. Like I said, dead within days according to my labs.
Well, 110 days until Scotland. After that, I can die happy, having realized my life-long dream. My knee can give out, my body can refuse to do anything, just not until after August 6.
All my life I've been told "don't eat unless you're hungry", "stop eating as soon as you are full", etc. Well, now, I'm concentrating so hard on getting in 90 grams of protein a day, and 25+ grams of fiber a day, and 1400-1600 calories a day (it was 1500-1700 until today...), not to mention the 47 supplements, that I was NEVER hungry, usually stuffed, and totally lacking in appetite.
So, today I went to see a new nutritionist. She is my new best friend. For starters, she eliminated most of my supplements, changed a few, and kept a few. Many were changed from huge horse pills to chewables, that can actually be absorbed in my pounch, rather than going right down the toilet. I haven't done the new count yet, but I know it's alot better, and since many of the ones I still have are chewable or sublingual, they won't take up any space. Next, she gave me a TON of ideas for foods. She also convinced me to try soy protein powder. I am not making any promises, becuase when I've tried it before I hated it, and my tummy has never been a big fan of soy. But she gave me a smoothie recipe I am willing to try, with soy powder, almond milk, blueberries, pineapple, and ice. Who knows, I might almost like it. And if not, it's 8-10 ounces, and I can drink that right up (or down...) She also gave me other guidelines, like which supplements to take with others, or away from others. I have to get 90 grams of protein daily. Well, the smoothie would give me 26. I can't drink while I eat. I knew that, but what are you gonna do when you have a big handful of supplements to take? So, now I'll take the few remaining ones 30 minutes AFTER I eat.
I called the doctor up at Canyon Ranch to schedule a consult with him about the changes, my new labs, and the hope of resuming at least SOME dairy and wheat. He is away all this week, but I will talk to him next Monday. My labs are a mess. For some odd reason (idiocy, perhaps?), my friends at LabCorp ran DOUBLE tests on several things. I had 2 doctors prescriptions, and there were some overlaps (one from my PCP, one from my bariatric surgeon). So what do they do? They run 2 CBCs, 2 Vitamin D levels, etc. And I'm willing to bet that my lovely HMO is not gonna pay for those! Great, just what I need. Anyway, some test I never heard of is giving me dire warnings that if my levels stay low for 3 months it means I have CKD. Huh? What's CKD? Only thing I can think of is Chronic Kidney Disease, and my kidneys are just fine, thank you very much. My iron saturation is so low that they put an ALERT message on it. This is after 3 or 4 IV iron infusions. Guess I'll be getting some more of those... Oh, and one Vitamin D level is only 2/3 of the low end of normal, while the other is at the high end of normal. From the same blood, the same day, the same time. If my labs are to be believed, I should probably expect to be dead within days. Of course, I don't necessarily believe them. I mean, they reported one blood glucose as 85 (which is about right for me), and the other as 107, which is high enough to concern anyone regarding insulin resistance, diabetes, etc. Well, duh, turns out the 107 was drawn the next day at the hematologist's office, NON FASTING, so it's normal, but it was listed as a fasting glucose.
In other news, I got the name and number of an orthopedist at the Hospital for Special Surgery in NYC. He specializes in knee replacements, specifically complicated cases and difficult revisions. Umm, yeah, that would be me. So I'll call him tomorrow and see when I can get in to see him. I rescheduled my CT scan too. I'm going Thursday, with or without approval from my HMO. I may have to pay for it out of pocket (and it's not cheap), but darn it, I need this test, and I'm going to have it! I'll fight them for the money later. (I mean seriously, what moron declines a CT scan for someone in my situation?) I wish to God I could find different insurance that wasn't insanely expensive. (yeah, me and how many million other Americans?) So, anyway, tomorrow is scale day. I have no idea what to expect. I've been feeling thinner, which means I will probably gain 3 pounds. I know, that makes no sense, but it's usually how it goes. Also, with 3 straight weeks of 4 pound losses, I'm due for a letdown. Not being a pessimist here, just a realist. And really, it's a number. Nothing more. I KNOW I'm doing the right things. One small (?) concern I do have is that yesterday when I was walking around the camp where I'd taken my daughter for an interview, we were going up some hills, and I got very tired, and more than a bit winded. This is not usual for me. Granted, neither is climbing hills, but still, I don't get winded at the gym when I'm working out for 45 minutes or more, why would a short walk up the hill be so hard? I wonder if it's related to my low hemoglobin (which shows the oxygen carrying ability of the red blood cells). Could be. Just want to be sure it isn't related to the sky high cardiac CRP levels I'm showing. Like I said, dead within days according to my labs.
Well, 110 days until Scotland. After that, I can die happy, having realized my life-long dream. My knee can give out, my body can refuse to do anything, just not until after August 6.
April 5, 2008 Climbing Up Out Of The Pit
Hard to believe I haven't written here in 11 days. It's been a loooooonnnnnnnggggg week. Seems like juggling 37 flaming batons wasn't enough, so I had to try juggling about 137. Eventually it felt like they were raining down on me, leaving me ducking for cover. It just kept coming and coming and coming. Here's the Readers Digest version:
1) my daughter is living in an alternate universe. In her world, everything is as she wishes it to be. This week, she has a 2nd cell phone--a golden Razor that cost $500,000. And she met her boyfriend in the park. And we spent last week in Turks and Caicos (just her and me, we left Danny home with his father.) OK, NONE of that is true, obviously, but this is what she is telling people. And while they may believe alot of it, the cell phone is over the top, and now everyone is laughing at her and calling her a liar. The really scary part is that I truly do not think she can distinguish from reality and fantasy. She asked me the other day if Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet drowned on the Titanic or if they survived. She doesn't GET that they were in a MOVIE, not on the actual ship...
2) My dear son seems to believe that he is KING of not only his sister's universe, but also the real one that the rest of us live in. I have been cursed at, ordered around, and treated with an utter lack of respect for so long, and nothing works. Now he has started doing it to my mother. OOOOOOHHHHHH NO! We do NOT go there!!! So I asked his father to let him stay there for awhile. Well, he's still here. 'nuff said. But we both read him the riot act, and I told him he has NO priveleges, effective immediately, unless I decide he has earned them by good behavior. I stopped his guitar lessons. I was going to stop his cooking classes, but we have to go anyway with Laura, so he'll stay--for now. And starting Monday, he will go to afterschool care until 6 pm except on days where he has counseling or cooking. That will give me a break from him, and also eliminate the "I'm done with my homework, why can't I have unlimited time on the computer/Wii/PSP/TV, etc?" So, now he has NONE of that.
3) my ex is a total jerk. (see above)
4) On Monday, I saw the surgeon about the "bump" in front of me. He ordered a CT scan. It was scheduled for yesterday. My dear insurance company denied it! what the ???
5) As I think I mentioned, that same surgeon has informed me that I need a skin graft to close this 5 year old draining abdominal wound.
6) That surgery will require 5 days in the hospital.
7) My hematologist is scratching his head because even though my ferritin levels are normal (whatever THAT means), my iron level is still too low, and I am still VERY anemic. So the IV iron isn't doing what it supposed to do. Why? Maybe because of the open wound (see #5)
8) my psycho dog has become a thief! Every day we leave him in the mudroom, and he has his little doggie door so he can go in and out as he pleases, and the backyard is fenced so he can't go beyond that. Well, he's been taking shoes, coats, etc from the mudroom and bringing them out through his door and leaving them all over the back yard! He has destroyed a sweater and a sweatshirt of mine, and yesterday he took Danny's new sneakers out in the rain and they are saturated!
9) I spent 5 hours at the dentist Tuesday, under sedation. The aftereffects were not pleasant this time--very tired and groggy, but also just "off". AND my teeth hurt where he worked on them, I still can't chew on the right side, and I have to take antibiotics for 10 days which make me nauseous!
10) And the best of all, the straw that broke the camel's back. I went to see the ortho that did my knee replacements 13.5 years ago. The one that has said at EVERY annual visit "they look as good as the day I put them in!", and told me we don't know how long they will last, they could last forever, but they still look great, has now told me that they have learned that the plastic parts (knee cap and others) BREAK DOWN AND TAKE THE BONE WITH THEM!!!!!!!!! And that you don't know when this is happening. Sometimes you get pain (which I AM), sometimes not, but if you wait too long, you can blow out your knee like you blow a tire. And then they open it up and find that the bone is gone too. WHAT???? He says I'm walking on borrowed time--they hoped for 10 years and it's going on 14. HUH??? This is news to me. Anyway, now it seems that I need two Total Knee Replacements, and I need them like, in a year. If the pain gets worse, I have to call him. If not, next spring we will set up for the surgeries (yes, that's plural, 2 knees=2 surgeries--I am NOT doing them both at the same time like i did before!)
This is SOOOOOO not the life I signed up for!!
By Wednesday I was a mess. I could barely put one foot in front of the other. I wanted to run away and join the circus! I couldn't talk to anyone, I was too miserable. Which set my BFF into a tizzy, because she wanted to come rescue me (oh, if only she could!!), so then I had to worry about HER too!! I went to my PCP and when she walked in the door, she stopped dead in her tracks and asked "what on earth happened to you?!" To which I responded by bursting into tears! She said she just saw me a week or so ago and I was the happiest person on earth, and now the total opposite. So, after a long discussion, she started me on Prozac. A low dose, but she said it should help the anxiety and irritability along with the depression. (I was really a raving rhymes with witch--ready to bite off the head of anyone who was foolish enough to get that close!)
Sooo, the update. Danny has been pretty much an angel since Wednesday night. Laura is still happily traveling in her alternate universe, but to the best of my knowledge, from the time she got up this morning until she left for Sylvan 45 minutes later, she didn't tell a single lie!! The dog has been sorely chastised, and nothing has been missing today...yet. And me? Well, lets just say I'm getting used to the idea of what's to come, and I'm looking into where I can go for a 2nd (and maybe 3rd) opinion on the knee issue. I am calmer. I am feeling pretty normal (whatever MY normal is, anyway) And what has had the biggest impact on that change? Just a chat I was having with my physical therapist yesterday, talking about summer vacations. I just realized that, my entire world may be falling apart around me,I may have 500 flaming batons to juggle, but in only 112 days, I AM GOING TO SCOTLAND!!!!
See, it's all a matter of perspective!!
So, I took advantage of no kids and BEAUTIFUL weather, and went for a long walk in the park. Home for lunch, ice on the knee, and some Spark time, and then I'm off to WalMart for a much needed pedicure. (Yup, our WalMart does nails!!)
So nice to be back in the land of the living. Although Laura's alternate universe is looking pretty good--just think, I'd have an intact abdomen, healthy knees, AND thin thighs!! Hmmmm, she may have the right idea here...And the good news is that the scale at least has been nice to me--4.2 pounds this week. It's just falling off of me!
1) my daughter is living in an alternate universe. In her world, everything is as she wishes it to be. This week, she has a 2nd cell phone--a golden Razor that cost $500,000. And she met her boyfriend in the park. And we spent last week in Turks and Caicos (just her and me, we left Danny home with his father.) OK, NONE of that is true, obviously, but this is what she is telling people. And while they may believe alot of it, the cell phone is over the top, and now everyone is laughing at her and calling her a liar. The really scary part is that I truly do not think she can distinguish from reality and fantasy. She asked me the other day if Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet drowned on the Titanic or if they survived. She doesn't GET that they were in a MOVIE, not on the actual ship...
2) My dear son seems to believe that he is KING of not only his sister's universe, but also the real one that the rest of us live in. I have been cursed at, ordered around, and treated with an utter lack of respect for so long, and nothing works. Now he has started doing it to my mother. OOOOOOHHHHHH NO! We do NOT go there!!! So I asked his father to let him stay there for awhile. Well, he's still here. 'nuff said. But we both read him the riot act, and I told him he has NO priveleges, effective immediately, unless I decide he has earned them by good behavior. I stopped his guitar lessons. I was going to stop his cooking classes, but we have to go anyway with Laura, so he'll stay--for now. And starting Monday, he will go to afterschool care until 6 pm except on days where he has counseling or cooking. That will give me a break from him, and also eliminate the "I'm done with my homework, why can't I have unlimited time on the computer/Wii/PSP/TV, etc?" So, now he has NONE of that.
3) my ex is a total jerk. (see above)
4) On Monday, I saw the surgeon about the "bump" in front of me. He ordered a CT scan. It was scheduled for yesterday. My dear insurance company denied it! what the ???
5) As I think I mentioned, that same surgeon has informed me that I need a skin graft to close this 5 year old draining abdominal wound.
6) That surgery will require 5 days in the hospital.
7) My hematologist is scratching his head because even though my ferritin levels are normal (whatever THAT means), my iron level is still too low, and I am still VERY anemic. So the IV iron isn't doing what it supposed to do. Why? Maybe because of the open wound (see #5)
8) my psycho dog has become a thief! Every day we leave him in the mudroom, and he has his little doggie door so he can go in and out as he pleases, and the backyard is fenced so he can't go beyond that. Well, he's been taking shoes, coats, etc from the mudroom and bringing them out through his door and leaving them all over the back yard! He has destroyed a sweater and a sweatshirt of mine, and yesterday he took Danny's new sneakers out in the rain and they are saturated!
9) I spent 5 hours at the dentist Tuesday, under sedation. The aftereffects were not pleasant this time--very tired and groggy, but also just "off". AND my teeth hurt where he worked on them, I still can't chew on the right side, and I have to take antibiotics for 10 days which make me nauseous!
10) And the best of all, the straw that broke the camel's back. I went to see the ortho that did my knee replacements 13.5 years ago. The one that has said at EVERY annual visit "they look as good as the day I put them in!", and told me we don't know how long they will last, they could last forever, but they still look great, has now told me that they have learned that the plastic parts (knee cap and others) BREAK DOWN AND TAKE THE BONE WITH THEM!!!!!!!!! And that you don't know when this is happening. Sometimes you get pain (which I AM), sometimes not, but if you wait too long, you can blow out your knee like you blow a tire. And then they open it up and find that the bone is gone too. WHAT???? He says I'm walking on borrowed time--they hoped for 10 years and it's going on 14. HUH??? This is news to me. Anyway, now it seems that I need two Total Knee Replacements, and I need them like, in a year. If the pain gets worse, I have to call him. If not, next spring we will set up for the surgeries (yes, that's plural, 2 knees=2 surgeries--I am NOT doing them both at the same time like i did before!)
This is SOOOOOO not the life I signed up for!!
By Wednesday I was a mess. I could barely put one foot in front of the other. I wanted to run away and join the circus! I couldn't talk to anyone, I was too miserable. Which set my BFF into a tizzy, because she wanted to come rescue me (oh, if only she could!!), so then I had to worry about HER too!! I went to my PCP and when she walked in the door, she stopped dead in her tracks and asked "what on earth happened to you?!" To which I responded by bursting into tears! She said she just saw me a week or so ago and I was the happiest person on earth, and now the total opposite. So, after a long discussion, she started me on Prozac. A low dose, but she said it should help the anxiety and irritability along with the depression. (I was really a raving rhymes with witch--ready to bite off the head of anyone who was foolish enough to get that close!)
Sooo, the update. Danny has been pretty much an angel since Wednesday night. Laura is still happily traveling in her alternate universe, but to the best of my knowledge, from the time she got up this morning until she left for Sylvan 45 minutes later, she didn't tell a single lie!! The dog has been sorely chastised, and nothing has been missing today...yet. And me? Well, lets just say I'm getting used to the idea of what's to come, and I'm looking into where I can go for a 2nd (and maybe 3rd) opinion on the knee issue. I am calmer. I am feeling pretty normal (whatever MY normal is, anyway) And what has had the biggest impact on that change? Just a chat I was having with my physical therapist yesterday, talking about summer vacations. I just realized that, my entire world may be falling apart around me,I may have 500 flaming batons to juggle, but in only 112 days, I AM GOING TO SCOTLAND!!!!
See, it's all a matter of perspective!!
So, I took advantage of no kids and BEAUTIFUL weather, and went for a long walk in the park. Home for lunch, ice on the knee, and some Spark time, and then I'm off to WalMart for a much needed pedicure. (Yup, our WalMart does nails!!)
So nice to be back in the land of the living. Although Laura's alternate universe is looking pretty good--just think, I'd have an intact abdomen, healthy knees, AND thin thighs!! Hmmmm, she may have the right idea here...And the good news is that the scale at least has been nice to me--4.2 pounds this week. It's just falling off of me!
March 25, 2008 The Scale Surprise
I LOVE my new scale! I think it likes me too! I am down 4.8 pounds this week, even though I did not exercise from Wednesday until today!! WOOHOOO! I really didn't expect this, after a good loss last week. I guess maybe my body is catching up? Or does this mean I wasn't eating enough with exercise, but without exercise it was enough? I'm sooooo confused! But it's a good sort of confusion.
My BMR dropped from 1913 to 1886, I guess due to the weight loss, but that's still 200 calories more than I'm eating, so I think I'm ok. If the stupid nutritionist from the hospital would EVER call me back, I might actually be able to ASK her! Well, I'm going to a WLS support group meeting on Thursday, and I'm going to check and see if I can work with someone there instead.
I am really taking care of myself. Today I called and scheduled an appointment with my knee ortho (haven't been there in about 16 months, supposed to go yearly, so I'm close) AND with my WLS surgeon (haven't gone in, ahem, like 5 years! ) I have to keep things on track! I think they will both be happy with how I'm doing. I see my PCP Thursday so she can look into why my CRP is sky high. I hope she doesn't order tons of tests. Lets just re-do that one and see if it comes down, now that I'm 7 weeks postop! I did 30 minutes on the elliptical today with no problem, and came home and iced for 30 minutes. Tomorrow I'll shoot for 30 on the treadmill. If that goes OK too, I'll go up SLOWLY--35 minutes, then 40, and so on up to 60. I'd like to get in the pool if I can, maybe even next week. I don't think I'm ready for a class yet, but some water walking could be a good choice. I won't be able to go Tuesday (sedation dentist all day), but the rest of the week should be OK.
This afternoon the kids baked muffins (blueberry, and cinnamon chocolate chip). They smell good. NO interest at all in eating them! I can honestly say I have absolutely NO interest in eating anything that is not healthy. Or anything that contains eggs, wheat or dairy since I'm supposed to avoid them. I realize my diet is not terribly interesting, and the variety could use a boost, but it's comfortable and actually quite easy for me to follow. And hey, I'm sticking with it, and that's HUGE!!!
My BMR dropped from 1913 to 1886, I guess due to the weight loss, but that's still 200 calories more than I'm eating, so I think I'm ok. If the stupid nutritionist from the hospital would EVER call me back, I might actually be able to ASK her! Well, I'm going to a WLS support group meeting on Thursday, and I'm going to check and see if I can work with someone there instead.
I am really taking care of myself. Today I called and scheduled an appointment with my knee ortho (haven't been there in about 16 months, supposed to go yearly, so I'm close) AND with my WLS surgeon (haven't gone in, ahem, like 5 years! ) I have to keep things on track! I think they will both be happy with how I'm doing. I see my PCP Thursday so she can look into why my CRP is sky high. I hope she doesn't order tons of tests. Lets just re-do that one and see if it comes down, now that I'm 7 weeks postop! I did 30 minutes on the elliptical today with no problem, and came home and iced for 30 minutes. Tomorrow I'll shoot for 30 on the treadmill. If that goes OK too, I'll go up SLOWLY--35 minutes, then 40, and so on up to 60. I'd like to get in the pool if I can, maybe even next week. I don't think I'm ready for a class yet, but some water walking could be a good choice. I won't be able to go Tuesday (sedation dentist all day), but the rest of the week should be OK.
This afternoon the kids baked muffins (blueberry, and cinnamon chocolate chip). They smell good. NO interest at all in eating them! I can honestly say I have absolutely NO interest in eating anything that is not healthy. Or anything that contains eggs, wheat or dairy since I'm supposed to avoid them. I realize my diet is not terribly interesting, and the variety could use a boost, but it's comfortable and actually quite easy for me to follow. And hey, I'm sticking with it, and that's HUGE!!!
March 23, 2008 A Naked Baked Potato
Today was a day of mini victories, all of the non-scale variety. I realize just how far I have come in this journey.
This morning we opened our Easter baskets (no candy for me, of course). I looked at Danny's PEEPs and thought, hmmmm. But then I decided (again) that I really didn't want to put that in my body today. So I popped one in the microwave, just to watch him die. We cooked him for 30 seconds, and he got really really big. I took him out before he could blow up all over the place. He deflated quickly, and we left him there on the plate and went to church. When we got home, it looked like he'd melted into a puddle ("I'm melting, I'm melting!"), and he was rock hard. Not too appetizing anymore.
I sang in church today (first time in quite awhile). I was able to stand there comfortably on 2 inch heels! AND I have breath control again! This is HUGE! It's been so long since I could get out a whole sustained song lyric in one breath. Even with that, my voice was strong. Might be the sinuses clearing up is doing the trick!!
Tonite I had dinner at Mom and Dad's. Simple. Just baked chicken, baked potato, and peas. But I forgot to bring my margerine. And they only eat butter. I looked, but there was nothing else to put on the potato. I thought about using just a little butter--it really wouldn't hurt. But then I thought about how that would just open the door to more exceptions. Today a tiny bit of butter, tomorrow a slice of pizza! I was going to just take it home and eat it here with my margerine, but I decided to try something new. So I cut it open, sprinkled on a little salt, and ate it naked! It was surprisingly good! I may do this again, and save the fat.
Now I'm sitting here looking at Easter baskets full of candy (NOT from me, from the "other" side of the family). But I can honestly say it doesn't appeal to me in the slightest. I just keep thinking about all the fat, sugar and chemicals in there, and it turns my stomach.
Tomorrow I will try the recumbent elliptical--my knee is MUCH better. Hopefully that will work out well, and I'll be able to resume my usual routine soon. Meanwhile, I'm savoring my little victories, and reminding myself that NOTHING tastes as good as being HEALTHY feels!!
This morning we opened our Easter baskets (no candy for me, of course). I looked at Danny's PEEPs and thought, hmmmm. But then I decided (again) that I really didn't want to put that in my body today. So I popped one in the microwave, just to watch him die. We cooked him for 30 seconds, and he got really really big. I took him out before he could blow up all over the place. He deflated quickly, and we left him there on the plate and went to church. When we got home, it looked like he'd melted into a puddle ("I'm melting, I'm melting!"), and he was rock hard. Not too appetizing anymore.
I sang in church today (first time in quite awhile). I was able to stand there comfortably on 2 inch heels! AND I have breath control again! This is HUGE! It's been so long since I could get out a whole sustained song lyric in one breath. Even with that, my voice was strong. Might be the sinuses clearing up is doing the trick!!
Tonite I had dinner at Mom and Dad's. Simple. Just baked chicken, baked potato, and peas. But I forgot to bring my margerine. And they only eat butter. I looked, but there was nothing else to put on the potato. I thought about using just a little butter--it really wouldn't hurt. But then I thought about how that would just open the door to more exceptions. Today a tiny bit of butter, tomorrow a slice of pizza! I was going to just take it home and eat it here with my margerine, but I decided to try something new. So I cut it open, sprinkled on a little salt, and ate it naked! It was surprisingly good! I may do this again, and save the fat.
Now I'm sitting here looking at Easter baskets full of candy (NOT from me, from the "other" side of the family). But I can honestly say it doesn't appeal to me in the slightest. I just keep thinking about all the fat, sugar and chemicals in there, and it turns my stomach.
Tomorrow I will try the recumbent elliptical--my knee is MUCH better. Hopefully that will work out well, and I'll be able to resume my usual routine soon. Meanwhile, I'm savoring my little victories, and reminding myself that NOTHING tastes as good as being HEALTHY feels!!
March 21, 2008 SIDELINED!!!!
I can't believe it. I'm banished from the gym. CRAP! I did my 60 minutes on the elliptical on Tuesday, and noticed that my left kneecap was bothering me. Wednesday, I did the treadmill, and got off after 50 minutes because it really hurt. I iced it, but that didnt' help. I took Thursday off as a rest day. Today at PT I asked Charlie about it. He said "your check engine light is on". I love the analogy. He said no gym in the acute phase, where it really hurts, even when I'm not exercising. When it gets a bit better, I can start slowly, maybe with the recumbent elliptical for 10-15 minutes. Then I can build up from there as tolerated. Heather thinks I may have developed some tendonitis, but since the pain is right over the kneecap, I don't know if that's likely. In any event, I CAN'T EXERCISE! And it's driving me nuts!
In other news, the scale was down 1.1 this week, on my new Tanita IronMan scale. I like the scale, and it weighs basically the same as my old one, so I know it's pretty accurate. It says I am 48% fat--alot different from what they said at Canyon Ranch, but, unfortunately, probably more realistic. Also, my C reactive protein was UP, this time to 75!! That's 25 times the normal max of 3!!! This is not good. Now I have to go see Dr. Rossi next week, and I'll probably end up having all sorts of tests done. It's probably due to my arthritis and went up becuase of the surgery, but who knows. My iron level is up to normal, which is good, and I don't have to have more IV iron--for now. BUT my hemoglobin is still too low--it actually dropped from 10.3 to 9.8 this week, which makes no sense at all.
I discovered a new, yummy lunch/dinner option. We had tacos on Tuesday, which I made with 1/2 and 1/2 ground beef and ground turkey. Very yummy. So, I kept aside 4 ounces for the next day, and just ate it mixed with rice. Quite tasty! Gotta get in that protein. I started tracking calcium intake too. Supposed to be 100-150 mg daily. Well, today I got...32. WOW, that's really sad. But with no dairy, I'm not surprised. Good thing I'm supplementing. Oh, speaking of which, I get to take yet another supplement--Glucosamine & Chondroitin, 3 horse pills a day! Those babies are ginormous!!
Today I had a MUCH needed massage. My neck and shoulders are sooooo tight! Laurie said she could see the atrophy of my shoulder muscles, but that will improve alot when I am cleared to do more active exercise with that arm. When I walked in, she was amazed at how I looked--she could really notice the weight loss! It's been an insane week with the kids, and now they're off for 10 days. This should be lots of fun...
In other news, the scale was down 1.1 this week, on my new Tanita IronMan scale. I like the scale, and it weighs basically the same as my old one, so I know it's pretty accurate. It says I am 48% fat--alot different from what they said at Canyon Ranch, but, unfortunately, probably more realistic. Also, my C reactive protein was UP, this time to 75!! That's 25 times the normal max of 3!!! This is not good. Now I have to go see Dr. Rossi next week, and I'll probably end up having all sorts of tests done. It's probably due to my arthritis and went up becuase of the surgery, but who knows. My iron level is up to normal, which is good, and I don't have to have more IV iron--for now. BUT my hemoglobin is still too low--it actually dropped from 10.3 to 9.8 this week, which makes no sense at all.
I discovered a new, yummy lunch/dinner option. We had tacos on Tuesday, which I made with 1/2 and 1/2 ground beef and ground turkey. Very yummy. So, I kept aside 4 ounces for the next day, and just ate it mixed with rice. Quite tasty! Gotta get in that protein. I started tracking calcium intake too. Supposed to be 100-150 mg daily. Well, today I got...32. WOW, that's really sad. But with no dairy, I'm not surprised. Good thing I'm supplementing. Oh, speaking of which, I get to take yet another supplement--Glucosamine & Chondroitin, 3 horse pills a day! Those babies are ginormous!!
Today I had a MUCH needed massage. My neck and shoulders are sooooo tight! Laurie said she could see the atrophy of my shoulder muscles, but that will improve alot when I am cleared to do more active exercise with that arm. When I walked in, she was amazed at how I looked--she could really notice the weight loss! It's been an insane week with the kids, and now they're off for 10 days. This should be lots of fun...
March 13, 2008 Eating Out and Other Stories
Well, I did it. For the first time (I think) since eliminating so many foods, I actually went out for dinner. It was pretty OK. We went to TGIFridays for Laura's school fundraiser. I had looked at the menu online so I knew what to expect. I ordered the Cedar Grilled Salmon, with a house salad (minus the croutons, cheese, and dressing...) and roasted red potaotes. I asked alot of questions, and our waitress, who was wonderful, made sure to tell the kitchen about my issues, and checked to see that no dairy, wheat, or eggs found their way onto my plate. I ate 1/2 the salmon (brought the rest home for tomorrow!)--it was pretty good. The salad was boring: iceberg lettuce, a few grape tomatoes, and some sliced cukes. I put on a little oil and balsamic vinegar (the balsamic viniagrette was iffy, so I skipped it) The potatoes were really yummy--just some oil and seasoning on them, so they were OK. I felt good about it. Nice to know it is doable.
At the gym today I decided to spend a little extra time on the elliptical, and did 45 minutes (up from 35 on Tuesday). It was actually easy! I could have gone farther, but I had to get home for Bible study. It's amazing to me that on January 2nd, I could barely manage 10 minutes on the lowest settings, and now here I am doing 45 minutes with some resistance and height, and it seems easy. Maybe Saturday I'll just do a whole hour! I've been noticing lately that each day, I write down my food, plan a little ahead, and then enter on SparkPeople in the evening, and 99% of the time, ALL my nutrients are in range--calories, fat, carbs, protein, fiber, and salt!!! I do believe I'm actually getting the hang of this. Of course, my diet is still pretty boring, but I'm slowly branching out to new things. If the nutritionist from the hospital ever calls me, I'll pick her brain for new and different ideas. And, hopefully, I will soon be able to add back SOME dairy and wheat. Even the occasional piece of cheese, cup of yogurt, or slice of whole grain bread would be such a huge help in terms of variety!
I really just cannot believe how much my lifestyle has changed in 10 weeks. If someone had told me on New Year's Day that before St. Patricks Day I would have become an exercise nut, or that I'd be cheerfully eating things like almond milk, healthy margerine, and organic everything, I would have laughed in their face! No way! Never! Not me! And yet, here I am. Eating what my body needs, taking the supplements it craves, and exercising, stretching, and strengthening it. What a concept! Now, I only wish I'd done this 20 years ago when I was still young and healthy enough to enjoy to results! But, alas, the damage is done, and some of it (like the joints and the digestive system) cannot be repaired. Still, I'll make the best of what I have, and treat it better--ALOT better. After all, if I don't take care of my body, where will I live?????
At the gym today I decided to spend a little extra time on the elliptical, and did 45 minutes (up from 35 on Tuesday). It was actually easy! I could have gone farther, but I had to get home for Bible study. It's amazing to me that on January 2nd, I could barely manage 10 minutes on the lowest settings, and now here I am doing 45 minutes with some resistance and height, and it seems easy. Maybe Saturday I'll just do a whole hour! I've been noticing lately that each day, I write down my food, plan a little ahead, and then enter on SparkPeople in the evening, and 99% of the time, ALL my nutrients are in range--calories, fat, carbs, protein, fiber, and salt!!! I do believe I'm actually getting the hang of this. Of course, my diet is still pretty boring, but I'm slowly branching out to new things. If the nutritionist from the hospital ever calls me, I'll pick her brain for new and different ideas. And, hopefully, I will soon be able to add back SOME dairy and wheat. Even the occasional piece of cheese, cup of yogurt, or slice of whole grain bread would be such a huge help in terms of variety!
I really just cannot believe how much my lifestyle has changed in 10 weeks. If someone had told me on New Year's Day that before St. Patricks Day I would have become an exercise nut, or that I'd be cheerfully eating things like almond milk, healthy margerine, and organic everything, I would have laughed in their face! No way! Never! Not me! And yet, here I am. Eating what my body needs, taking the supplements it craves, and exercising, stretching, and strengthening it. What a concept! Now, I only wish I'd done this 20 years ago when I was still young and healthy enough to enjoy to results! But, alas, the damage is done, and some of it (like the joints and the digestive system) cannot be repaired. Still, I'll make the best of what I have, and treat it better--ALOT better. After all, if I don't take care of my body, where will I live?????
March 11, 2008 The Scale Moves At Last!
4.9 pounds! WoooHooo!!! It's about time the scale caught up with me! I knew I'd been losing but the scale just wouldn't budge more than a few tenths of a pound at a time, and not always in the right direction. But at last, we seem to be on the same page! And I'm in the 250s for the first time in a LONG time. How did I celebrate? By going back to bed for 2 hours and skipping the gym. Actually, that was NOT a celebration. I am just SOOOO tired from this stupid time change that I cannot seem to get it in gear! Hopefully I'll sleep better tonite and feel more energetic tomorrow. Amazingly, this is what I used to feel like ALL THE TIME! I guess I hadn't realized how bad it was untl I started feeling good.
I tried my new breakfast sausage today--organic pork links. The were quite good! At least now I can alternte them with the chicken ones. AND--today's Spark Recipe of the day was a 5 grain cereal that you cook overnite in the crock pot. It has bulgar listed, which is wheat, so I just substitued millet. That goes along with oats, barley, quinoa, and brown rice. Hey--I'll try anything! I hope it's good, and I can add it to my breakfast rotation. I really need to come up with some new ideas for lunch. Salad with some sort of seafood, and a potato/rice/barley with margerine is fine, but not every day! I suppose I should try to find some new recipes. I think I've just fallen into a rut with my menu! My shoulder still hurts--ALOT. I did no PT exercises today. I'm just resting it. We'll see what Charlie has to say tomorrow morning. I'm using the sling again when I'm out of the house. I hope to God I didn't do any damage by overusing it. That would just be the pits!!
I think I'm becoming a hermit. All I want to do is go to the gym and PT, and then come home and read or go online. I don't want to go ANYWHERE, and I find I'm even on the phone less than usual. Is my world becoming too small? I know I'm not depressed, and when I do interact with others I'm happy about it, but I just seem to prefer to keep close to home. Maybe because it's easier to deal with food here than elsewhere? Maybe I'm just "circling the wagons" for right now. I wish Spring would hurry up and get here!!
I tried my new breakfast sausage today--organic pork links. The were quite good! At least now I can alternte them with the chicken ones. AND--today's Spark Recipe of the day was a 5 grain cereal that you cook overnite in the crock pot. It has bulgar listed, which is wheat, so I just substitued millet. That goes along with oats, barley, quinoa, and brown rice. Hey--I'll try anything! I hope it's good, and I can add it to my breakfast rotation. I really need to come up with some new ideas for lunch. Salad with some sort of seafood, and a potato/rice/barley with margerine is fine, but not every day! I suppose I should try to find some new recipes. I think I've just fallen into a rut with my menu! My shoulder still hurts--ALOT. I did no PT exercises today. I'm just resting it. We'll see what Charlie has to say tomorrow morning. I'm using the sling again when I'm out of the house. I hope to God I didn't do any damage by overusing it. That would just be the pits!!
I think I'm becoming a hermit. All I want to do is go to the gym and PT, and then come home and read or go online. I don't want to go ANYWHERE, and I find I'm even on the phone less than usual. Is my world becoming too small? I know I'm not depressed, and when I do interact with others I'm happy about it, but I just seem to prefer to keep close to home. Maybe because it's easier to deal with food here than elsewhere? Maybe I'm just "circling the wagons" for right now. I wish Spring would hurry up and get here!!
March 10, 2008 Cookin' Up A Storm
Yup, that's me, Chef Wendy. I feel like all I've done the last 2 days is cook! Yesterday I made a big ol' vat of sauce with tons of veggies, ground turkey, ground beef, and turkey sausage. YUMMO!! I also tried a remake of my beloved tuna noodle casserole, using rice. Instead of cream of celery soup, I tried making a white sauce with almond milk, cornstarch and broth, and celery. It seemed to work ok, but when I took it out of the oven, it was NASTY tasting! I managed to eat 1/2 a serving, but had to dump the rest. Laura spit out the one bite she tried. Oh well, live and learn. I had 1/2 portion of my sauce to make up for it, and at least that was yummy!
Tonight I made stuffed peppers. I used a SparkPeople recipe, and it was soooooo good! We all loved it, and I've been asked to put it on the menu rotation. No problemo!
I did 35 minutes on the elliptical today--would have stopped at 30 but I was in the middle of a chapter and I wanted to finish, so... I wonder if I could handle 45 minutes? Don't see why not. Maybe I'll give it a shot. When I was coming out of the gym, I noticed they had a table set up outside with nutrition info. There was a bag with a model of 5 pounds of fat. YUCK!! I can't believe 44 of those have come off of me! I'd like to do an Oprah and put them in a wagon and pull it around for a bit. Even a backpack with 4 of them (20 pounds) would be an awesome way to realize what I've lost in the past 2 months. Or, as someone else said (on a cool list of what weighs so many pounds), I've lost an average automobile tire and a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts this year, and since 5/14/01 I've lost an average American fashion model (117 pounds) plus a 2 month old horse (100 pounds) plus an ostrich egg (4 pounds). Kind of puts it in perspective!!!
The time change is killing me. I am SOOOO tired, and I really did NOT want to get up this AM! And that was after having a tough time falling asleep last night, since it seemed too early. It's gonna take me a week to get my act in gear. And if Spring doesn't come soon I'm gonna scream--I am SO tired of cold and grey! At least we didn't get hammered with snow this year.
My shoulder is coming along. A bit sore today since I used it WAY too much yesterday cooking. I really have to be careful not to overdo it. Did a sort of abreviated PT session--no pushing it. Tomorrow I'll resume my normal home routine. I also had my first lymphatic drainage today. Very relaxing. I hope it helps. Might be coincidental, but I've had to pee alot today. Hopefully that will show up on the scale tomorrow morning!
Tonight I made stuffed peppers. I used a SparkPeople recipe, and it was soooooo good! We all loved it, and I've been asked to put it on the menu rotation. No problemo!
I did 35 minutes on the elliptical today--would have stopped at 30 but I was in the middle of a chapter and I wanted to finish, so... I wonder if I could handle 45 minutes? Don't see why not. Maybe I'll give it a shot. When I was coming out of the gym, I noticed they had a table set up outside with nutrition info. There was a bag with a model of 5 pounds of fat. YUCK!! I can't believe 44 of those have come off of me! I'd like to do an Oprah and put them in a wagon and pull it around for a bit. Even a backpack with 4 of them (20 pounds) would be an awesome way to realize what I've lost in the past 2 months. Or, as someone else said (on a cool list of what weighs so many pounds), I've lost an average automobile tire and a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts this year, and since 5/14/01 I've lost an average American fashion model (117 pounds) plus a 2 month old horse (100 pounds) plus an ostrich egg (4 pounds). Kind of puts it in perspective!!!
The time change is killing me. I am SOOOO tired, and I really did NOT want to get up this AM! And that was after having a tough time falling asleep last night, since it seemed too early. It's gonna take me a week to get my act in gear. And if Spring doesn't come soon I'm gonna scream--I am SO tired of cold and grey! At least we didn't get hammered with snow this year.
My shoulder is coming along. A bit sore today since I used it WAY too much yesterday cooking. I really have to be careful not to overdo it. Did a sort of abreviated PT session--no pushing it. Tomorrow I'll resume my normal home routine. I also had my first lymphatic drainage today. Very relaxing. I hope it helps. Might be coincidental, but I've had to pee alot today. Hopefully that will show up on the scale tomorrow morning!
March 8, 2008 Making The Pilgrimage
To Whole Foods, that is! Despite monsoon quality rains and gale force winds, I made the 40 minute journey to restock my kitchen. After 2 hours and nearly $200, i came home with LOTS of stuff! I will be doing some serious cooking tomorrow. I am reinventing my tuna noodle casserole as tuna RICE casserole, using a white sauce made with cornstarch and almond milk in place of the cream of celery soup that I can't eat. We'll see how it turns out. I am also going to cook up a great big pot of my meat and veggie sauce that I usually make with ground beef and pork sausage. I will be using ground turkey and turkey sausage instead, and all organic ingredients (veggies, oil, etc) Can't wait to see the difference!
I've been faithfully going to the gym. I took Thursday as my off day since I was at the dentist all day and then slept 4 hours when I got home! (that sedation dentistry is AWESOME!). And I only did 30 minutes on the treadmill yesterday because I felt like I ws going to fall asleep! But today I was back to 30 on the elliptical, and on Monday I'll be doing my 45 on the treadmill. It is definitely getting easier, but i can't ramp it up yet because of safety issues with my arm. Soon, though!
Yesterday was my first full day out of the sling. And my last for awhile too! It HURT after awhile! So today I kept it on when I was out and about, but off when at home. MUCH better. My weighin on Tuesday had me down just 0.7 pounds, but I had only started back on the "water pill" on Monday, and I was still bloated. I can really tell a difference now, and I assume I'll have a better loss this coming week. I hope so! I went and bought myself a new scale. This one is ultra fancy and does everything except my laundry! Can't wait to try it out and see what it says! It will be interesting to see how it compares with my cheapie scale that I've been using so far. I hope it doesn't tell me that I'm heavier than I thought I was!
Today at Whole Foods I decided to check out some new grains and cereals. I bought buckwheat cereal for a change at breakfast, and got millet and quinoa to try at other meals. I'm just gettng a bit weary of potatoes, rice, and oatmeal!! Hopefully I will speak to Dr. Murray next week and he'll give me the ok to have some occasional yogurt, cheese, and/or wheat. Time will tell. I took measurements on Tuesday for the first time--figured it was a good idea. My waist measured at 42", which is 2" less than at Canyon Ranch! Not too shabby. I think i'll measure once a month and see how the progress goes. The weight DOES matter, as I need to put less pressure on my joints, but there are other ways to measure my progress, and I AM making progress here.
I've been faithfully going to the gym. I took Thursday as my off day since I was at the dentist all day and then slept 4 hours when I got home! (that sedation dentistry is AWESOME!). And I only did 30 minutes on the treadmill yesterday because I felt like I ws going to fall asleep! But today I was back to 30 on the elliptical, and on Monday I'll be doing my 45 on the treadmill. It is definitely getting easier, but i can't ramp it up yet because of safety issues with my arm. Soon, though!
Yesterday was my first full day out of the sling. And my last for awhile too! It HURT after awhile! So today I kept it on when I was out and about, but off when at home. MUCH better. My weighin on Tuesday had me down just 0.7 pounds, but I had only started back on the "water pill" on Monday, and I was still bloated. I can really tell a difference now, and I assume I'll have a better loss this coming week. I hope so! I went and bought myself a new scale. This one is ultra fancy and does everything except my laundry! Can't wait to try it out and see what it says! It will be interesting to see how it compares with my cheapie scale that I've been using so far. I hope it doesn't tell me that I'm heavier than I thought I was!
Today at Whole Foods I decided to check out some new grains and cereals. I bought buckwheat cereal for a change at breakfast, and got millet and quinoa to try at other meals. I'm just gettng a bit weary of potatoes, rice, and oatmeal!! Hopefully I will speak to Dr. Murray next week and he'll give me the ok to have some occasional yogurt, cheese, and/or wheat. Time will tell. I took measurements on Tuesday for the first time--figured it was a good idea. My waist measured at 42", which is 2" less than at Canyon Ranch! Not too shabby. I think i'll measure once a month and see how the progress goes. The weight DOES matter, as I need to put less pressure on my joints, but there are other ways to measure my progress, and I AM making progress here.
March 3, 2008 The Protein Dilemna
Hmmm. According to some folks, I should be consuming 1 gram of protein per pound of body weight each day. So for me, that would be 265 grams of protein daily. Uhhh, that would be over 70% of my calories for the day! Not to mention the fact that I'm happy if I get in over 80 grams a day! I have absolutely no idea how on earth I could ever get in 3 times as much as I do now. In addition, I'm unable to tolerate most protein supplements. The vast majority are made from whey or soy, which I cannot have. And the rice protein is just AWFUL!! I certanly can't imagine consuming 180 grams worth of rice protein daily! Oh, well, I'm gonna stick with what my nutritionist told me and aim for 80-110 grams a day.
In other news, I did the gym today before PT and it was probably a mistake. I was SOOOO tired in PT!! 45 minutes on the treadmill kind of tires me out, ya know? And I upped the speed to 2.1 mph with no problem. So in a few days I'll try for 2.2. Eventually I would really like to be able to go steadily at 2.5 for 45 minutes or more. I don't walk faster than that in "real life" so I don't feel the need to go faster at this point. Given my orthopedic limitations, I'll be quite happy at 2.5!!
My new Polar heart rate monitor arrived today. I've gotta set it up so I can use it tomorrow when I do the elliptical!! Tomorrow is weigh in. I'm not expecting much since I just resumed the Maxzide today. I can feel that my legs are still very "full", so even though I ran to the bathroom alot today, I think I've got a few more days before the extra fluid clears out. I just hope I get a tiny little loss--0.1 pounds would be just fine! Meanwhile, I KNOW I'm losing, since I can wear smaller clothes without a problem. Well, the number will be what the number will be--I know I've done my part!!!
My mood seems to be changing. I am alot happier lately! And this is even with backing off on the Lexapro. Hopefully I'll be able to be off it altogether by the end of next week. In any event, I feel like i'm enjoying my kids more (most of the time!!), and in general just feeling happier. Hey, whatever the reason, I'll take it!!
In other news, I did the gym today before PT and it was probably a mistake. I was SOOOO tired in PT!! 45 minutes on the treadmill kind of tires me out, ya know? And I upped the speed to 2.1 mph with no problem. So in a few days I'll try for 2.2. Eventually I would really like to be able to go steadily at 2.5 for 45 minutes or more. I don't walk faster than that in "real life" so I don't feel the need to go faster at this point. Given my orthopedic limitations, I'll be quite happy at 2.5!!
My new Polar heart rate monitor arrived today. I've gotta set it up so I can use it tomorrow when I do the elliptical!! Tomorrow is weigh in. I'm not expecting much since I just resumed the Maxzide today. I can feel that my legs are still very "full", so even though I ran to the bathroom alot today, I think I've got a few more days before the extra fluid clears out. I just hope I get a tiny little loss--0.1 pounds would be just fine! Meanwhile, I KNOW I'm losing, since I can wear smaller clothes without a problem. Well, the number will be what the number will be--I know I've done my part!!!
My mood seems to be changing. I am alot happier lately! And this is even with backing off on the Lexapro. Hopefully I'll be able to be off it altogether by the end of next week. In any event, I feel like i'm enjoying my kids more (most of the time!!), and in general just feeling happier. Hey, whatever the reason, I'll take it!!
March 2, 2008 Move Those Chips!!!
Here I've been feeling really good about the fact that food has not been calling me. But this afternoon I was at a friend's house, and she had put out organic corn tortilla chips. I checked the label, saw they were ok, and took 2 (serving size is 15). No problem, right? WRONG!! I kept coming back to them, and was actually stupid enough to go hang out by them! I ended up having probably about 20 chips--a good 200 calories worth! My first actual "cheat". (Hey, I made it 2 months without...)
OK, so onward. I honestly logged it into my food logs, both written and on SparkPeople, so I'm not trying to hide anything. (also a very NEW thing for me with food logs!)
The last few days have been busy, which is why I haven't journaled in a bit. Friday was a good day--I hit the gym and did 45 minutes on the treadmill. Even though I stretched afterwards, I was quite sore!! But it was well worth it. I am SO happy to be back in the gym!!Yesterday was my day off from the gym--I had the kids and it was not going to work out. But I got my exercise a different way! (see below) I woke up in the morning feeling crappy--sort of a cross between "I'm starvng" and "I feel like I'm gonna barf". I bagged the breakfast plan, and about 10:30 I nibbled on a tiny baked potato. I only ate maybe half of it. No pills, supplements, or amino acid drinks for me. After going to the chiropractor and having a mini-massage, I did feel better. So for lunch I had a small bowl of rice with my veggie-meat sauce. It seemed to set ok. By midafternoon I was feeling much better. I had some mango and nuts for my snack. Then it was time to leave for the Casting Crowns concert!!!!!! We had a nice drive up, with everyone chatting about everything. 8 of us in Amy's Suburban, and we were all pretty comfy! (we did put the 3 kids in the way back) I ate my dinner on the way--a repeat of lunch, plus an apple. We were very fortunate to get GREAT parking--Amy had reserved online--and didn't have to walk too far in the cold wind.The concert was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! Totally blew me away. It was so inspiring, so amazing to be with 5000 other believers, just giving praise and worship to the Lord. We were up and dancing to the music--now THAT is exercise I can live with!! Laura wanted popcorn, so I got her some, and some water. I had maybe 1/2 cup of the popcorn, and we shared the water. (I checked, the popcorn was popped with a bit of oil, but nothing else on it--we even watched it pop!) Later she wanted ice cream, and I honestly had no desire for any.
On the way home I had my granola, with some raisins mixed in (I had to boost my calories somewhere!) We got home after midnight, so sleep was short. But I had no problem popping up out of bed this morning for church!
Today I'm happy to say I was feeling fine and back on the normal routine as far as food goes. (well, other than the tortilla chips...) I hit the gym this afternoon and did 30 minutes on the elliptical (and burned MORE than the calories I ate in chips!) and felt pretty darned good! It will be an early night, since we were all up too late last night. Bed will feel good!!!
OK, so onward. I honestly logged it into my food logs, both written and on SparkPeople, so I'm not trying to hide anything. (also a very NEW thing for me with food logs!)
The last few days have been busy, which is why I haven't journaled in a bit. Friday was a good day--I hit the gym and did 45 minutes on the treadmill. Even though I stretched afterwards, I was quite sore!! But it was well worth it. I am SO happy to be back in the gym!!Yesterday was my day off from the gym--I had the kids and it was not going to work out. But I got my exercise a different way! (see below) I woke up in the morning feeling crappy--sort of a cross between "I'm starvng" and "I feel like I'm gonna barf". I bagged the breakfast plan, and about 10:30 I nibbled on a tiny baked potato. I only ate maybe half of it. No pills, supplements, or amino acid drinks for me. After going to the chiropractor and having a mini-massage, I did feel better. So for lunch I had a small bowl of rice with my veggie-meat sauce. It seemed to set ok. By midafternoon I was feeling much better. I had some mango and nuts for my snack. Then it was time to leave for the Casting Crowns concert!!!!!! We had a nice drive up, with everyone chatting about everything. 8 of us in Amy's Suburban, and we were all pretty comfy! (we did put the 3 kids in the way back) I ate my dinner on the way--a repeat of lunch, plus an apple. We were very fortunate to get GREAT parking--Amy had reserved online--and didn't have to walk too far in the cold wind.The concert was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! Totally blew me away. It was so inspiring, so amazing to be with 5000 other believers, just giving praise and worship to the Lord. We were up and dancing to the music--now THAT is exercise I can live with!! Laura wanted popcorn, so I got her some, and some water. I had maybe 1/2 cup of the popcorn, and we shared the water. (I checked, the popcorn was popped with a bit of oil, but nothing else on it--we even watched it pop!) Later she wanted ice cream, and I honestly had no desire for any.
On the way home I had my granola, with some raisins mixed in (I had to boost my calories somewhere!) We got home after midnight, so sleep was short. But I had no problem popping up out of bed this morning for church!
Today I'm happy to say I was feeling fine and back on the normal routine as far as food goes. (well, other than the tortilla chips...) I hit the gym this afternoon and did 30 minutes on the elliptical (and burned MORE than the calories I ate in chips!) and felt pretty darned good! It will be an early night, since we were all up too late last night. Bed will feel good!!!
February 28, 2008 MORE Calories?!?!?!
This morning I went and had my basal metabolic rate measured. It was pretty cool, just breathe in and out through a tube for 10 minutes. Turns out, guess what! I'm not eating enough calories! I've been doing around 1400-1500, and I need 1533-1915, just to cover breathing, never mind the exercise and daily activities. Wow! Who knew?
So off I went home to figure out where and how to add this in. I mean, it's only 200 calories, but still, where will they come from? I decided I should add them proportionately to my overall calories. About 25-30% fat, about 30% protein, and about 40-45% carbs. Cool! It works!!!For today, I added 1/2 oz tuna at lunch, about 50 grams potato and 1 oz chicken at dinner, and 1T nuts at my snack. Not too hard, except the extra chicken at dinner. This brought me to 1555 calories, 204 grams of carbs, 52 grams of fat and 81 grams of protien (which barely makes it, since I'm supposed to do 80 to 110 grams). Tomorrow will be easier protein-wise, since I'll have my morning snack which includes 2 ounces of turkey. Today I had breakfast late because of the test, which was done fasting, so I had no AM snack. Ah, well, it all works out in the end!
So I went to the gym, and did 30 minutes on the elliptical. The machine says I burned 203 calories, but SparkPeople says 463!!! Then I did 10 minutes on the treadmill, at 2mph, NOT holding on! Another 40 calories. BIG difference!! I wonder why that is, considering the elliptical seems SO much easier to me! I guess for now I'll alternate between 30 minutes (or more) on the elliptical, and 45 on the treadmill. 3 days of each? That ought to cover it!! At 600 calories every two days, that comes out to an average of 300, and to 1800 for the week. Not too shabby!!! And that doesn't even count the strength and stretching of PT! My calories are based on 200 calories a day for exercise, or 1400 for the week, so I should be a bit ahead of the game. I felt SO good after exercising, even though my legs are a bit tired!
I left my name and number with the desk so a nutritionist can call me. I want to set up an appointment with someone familiar with bariatric nutrition as well as exercise. This could be REALLY good!!!
The agency screwed up my helpers. AGAIN. Apparently Esmin called them and said she can't come back until Tuesday. But Monica has to leave tomorrow as planned because she starts a new job on Sunday. So they called and said they will send someone else tomorrow until Tuesday when Esmin returns. I really didn't like the idea of yet another person to get used to, even for just 4 days. So, after talking to Mom and Tracey about it, I called back and said to cancel the new girl, and to cancel Esmin for Tuesday, and I'll just end things tomorrow when Monica leaves. I mean, really, what were they doing for me? Hooking my bra? Helping me put on my sneakers? Well guess what? I won't WEAR a bra unless Laura is here to hook it for me! And my sneakers are now just right so I can slip them on. Voila! I'm self sufficient!! The laundry is all up to date, and the kids can help until Lorie comes back (and Tracey offered to do it if I need her to). The house is squeaky clean, so that can last until Lorie comes back. I'm already doing the cooking (except tonite, when Danny cooked the chicken that they'd made Sunday at cooking school), and if the kids have to help empty the dishwasher and do the grocery shopping, oh well! Meanwhile, it will save me a bunch of $$$. As for the bra, I just ordered a new one that hooks in the front. That should solve that problem pretty quickly! As much as I hate them, at least it will get me through until I can hook the regular one myself. And at $14, you just can't go wrong!
I went for my iron infusion today, and for some weird reason, my hemoglobin DROPPED from last week! OK, only 3/10 of a point, but still, you'd think it would go UP since I had the infusion last week. Oh well, at least I'm still in double digits!!
All in all, a rather productive day!
So off I went home to figure out where and how to add this in. I mean, it's only 200 calories, but still, where will they come from? I decided I should add them proportionately to my overall calories. About 25-30% fat, about 30% protein, and about 40-45% carbs. Cool! It works!!!For today, I added 1/2 oz tuna at lunch, about 50 grams potato and 1 oz chicken at dinner, and 1T nuts at my snack. Not too hard, except the extra chicken at dinner. This brought me to 1555 calories, 204 grams of carbs, 52 grams of fat and 81 grams of protien (which barely makes it, since I'm supposed to do 80 to 110 grams). Tomorrow will be easier protein-wise, since I'll have my morning snack which includes 2 ounces of turkey. Today I had breakfast late because of the test, which was done fasting, so I had no AM snack. Ah, well, it all works out in the end!
So I went to the gym, and did 30 minutes on the elliptical. The machine says I burned 203 calories, but SparkPeople says 463!!! Then I did 10 minutes on the treadmill, at 2mph, NOT holding on! Another 40 calories. BIG difference!! I wonder why that is, considering the elliptical seems SO much easier to me! I guess for now I'll alternate between 30 minutes (or more) on the elliptical, and 45 on the treadmill. 3 days of each? That ought to cover it!! At 600 calories every two days, that comes out to an average of 300, and to 1800 for the week. Not too shabby!!! And that doesn't even count the strength and stretching of PT! My calories are based on 200 calories a day for exercise, or 1400 for the week, so I should be a bit ahead of the game. I felt SO good after exercising, even though my legs are a bit tired!
I left my name and number with the desk so a nutritionist can call me. I want to set up an appointment with someone familiar with bariatric nutrition as well as exercise. This could be REALLY good!!!
The agency screwed up my helpers. AGAIN. Apparently Esmin called them and said she can't come back until Tuesday. But Monica has to leave tomorrow as planned because she starts a new job on Sunday. So they called and said they will send someone else tomorrow until Tuesday when Esmin returns. I really didn't like the idea of yet another person to get used to, even for just 4 days. So, after talking to Mom and Tracey about it, I called back and said to cancel the new girl, and to cancel Esmin for Tuesday, and I'll just end things tomorrow when Monica leaves. I mean, really, what were they doing for me? Hooking my bra? Helping me put on my sneakers? Well guess what? I won't WEAR a bra unless Laura is here to hook it for me! And my sneakers are now just right so I can slip them on. Voila! I'm self sufficient!! The laundry is all up to date, and the kids can help until Lorie comes back (and Tracey offered to do it if I need her to). The house is squeaky clean, so that can last until Lorie comes back. I'm already doing the cooking (except tonite, when Danny cooked the chicken that they'd made Sunday at cooking school), and if the kids have to help empty the dishwasher and do the grocery shopping, oh well! Meanwhile, it will save me a bunch of $$$. As for the bra, I just ordered a new one that hooks in the front. That should solve that problem pretty quickly! As much as I hate them, at least it will get me through until I can hook the regular one myself. And at $14, you just can't go wrong!
I went for my iron infusion today, and for some weird reason, my hemoglobin DROPPED from last week! OK, only 3/10 of a point, but still, you'd think it would go UP since I had the infusion last week. Oh well, at least I'm still in double digits!!
All in all, a rather productive day!
February 27, 2008 Technologically Impaired At The Gym
Oh, I am soooo clueless!!! The machines at the new gym are rather confusing! They all have their own TV (these are just the cardio machines). I cannot figure out how to hook my headphones up and get any sound out of them! Also, I got on a machine today thinking it was the elliptical, and it was like a ski machine without using your arms. it about killed me!! And the first "elliptical" I got on was actually a stair climber thingy and I couldn't even get ON it!! All of this is not surprising, considering I can't fully program my cell phone, or get the bluetooth connection to work, or even get the stupid message light to stop flashing on my phone when there are no messages!! I'm hopeless!
In any event, I had a very productive day. I was at the gym/PT place for nearly 4 hours!!! (Only 30 minutes in the gym doing any actual exercise though...) I had my eval for lymphatic drainage--I'm set up for 3 times a week starting the week of March 10 (no openings before that...) I was able to coordinate the LD and the PT so I'm not making multiple trips each day. It looks like I AM going to need compression stockings, which I already knew. I guess I just need the prescription from the doctor and I can go get measured. PT was good--I can finally do "active-assisted" exercise, not just passive. So I have to do stuff with a cane to move my right arm by pushing the left, and also isometrics. And I get to use the pulley instead of the dreaded wall walking!!! YAY!!! Much easier in my opinion. The LD therapist also suggested some rear leg lifts to strengthen my hip muscles. Hey, if it helps, I'm on it!! The good news is that I CAN go to the gym again tomorrow. YAY! Cell was cancelled, so I have free time from 10-12. I have to be there at 8am for the basal metabolic measurement. They will tell me how many calories i actually need. This could be interesting! I can really tell that I did more in PT today--my shoulder is a little sore. But it's well worth it to know that I'm making good progress. And I'm still doing well with food, so something is obviously happening in my life. Oh, yeah, I'M TAKING CARE OF MYSELF!!!
In any event, I had a very productive day. I was at the gym/PT place for nearly 4 hours!!! (Only 30 minutes in the gym doing any actual exercise though...) I had my eval for lymphatic drainage--I'm set up for 3 times a week starting the week of March 10 (no openings before that...) I was able to coordinate the LD and the PT so I'm not making multiple trips each day. It looks like I AM going to need compression stockings, which I already knew. I guess I just need the prescription from the doctor and I can go get measured. PT was good--I can finally do "active-assisted" exercise, not just passive. So I have to do stuff with a cane to move my right arm by pushing the left, and also isometrics. And I get to use the pulley instead of the dreaded wall walking!!! YAY!!! Much easier in my opinion. The LD therapist also suggested some rear leg lifts to strengthen my hip muscles. Hey, if it helps, I'm on it!! The good news is that I CAN go to the gym again tomorrow. YAY! Cell was cancelled, so I have free time from 10-12. I have to be there at 8am for the basal metabolic measurement. They will tell me how many calories i actually need. This could be interesting! I can really tell that I did more in PT today--my shoulder is a little sore. But it's well worth it to know that I'm making good progress. And I'm still doing well with food, so something is obviously happening in my life. Oh, yeah, I'M TAKING CARE OF MYSELF!!!
February 26, 2008 Back to the GYM!!!
Yup, that's right! I got clearance from all my doctors, and headed to the gym right after lunch today. I got signed in, photographed, and then it was up on the treadmill for me! I did 30 minutes, a full mile! It felt sooooo good! Tomorrow I will probably try the elliptical, and see how I do with just one hand. The trainer I spoke with today said I should not be using either hand on the TM or the elliptical. HUH? My balance isnt' good enough without holding on! I'm liable to fall right on my face! Hmmm, well, guess I could TRY....
It's funny (as in funny strange, not funny haha), but I always, ALWAYS hated writing down everything I ate. Maybe because I felt I couldnt' cheat? But this time around, keeping track has been a godsend. Why is it different? Well, I think a big part of it (maybe all of it?) is the elimination thing. Not being able to have eggs, milk or wheat has so greatly limited what I CAN eat, that if I don't write down what I DO eat, I'll never remember the ideas from one day to the next! I know, pathetic, right?
I can honestly say that in the past 8 weeks I have had almost no desire to "cheat". And trust me when I say that is unheard of for me! At this point, it's pretty easy, since the things I would most likely cheat with are things I can't eat due to the sensitivity thing. I mean, having bread and butter won't only wreak havoc on the scale, but it would totally screw up the whole elimination thing. And that, I'm just not willing to do at this point!
I must admit though that right now, having had my evening granola early, I am sorely tempted to go have more! Would it kill me? No, it's 140 calories, not 1000. But I am trying very hard to "ride the wave" and not do it. So, instead, I'm here writing about it. With the scale being so weird for me--up a bit one week, down alot the next, and then back and forth between the two--it would be easy for me to throw up my hands in disgust and just give up. But I'm not going to do that! The trend is downward, and that's what matters. I'm wearing my "skinnier" pants (if you can call a size 20W "skinny") and feeling great. I spent 30 minutes on the treadmill today. (WOOHOOO, that felt GOOD!!!! ) And I KNOW that I am eating just the way I should be eating. I've come prepared for the battle of the bulge. I am fully armed. And now the outcome is not up to me anymore. My body will do what it will do. I cannot force it to lose any faster or more consistently. I cannot make it walk faster, or climb higher, or stretch farther. It is what it is. As long as I keep doing my part (eating right, taking the supplements, and exercising), I know I am doing all I can to win the battle. The rest is up to my body. I just hope and pray it has forgiven me for all the years of abuse and neglect.
It's funny (as in funny strange, not funny haha), but I always, ALWAYS hated writing down everything I ate. Maybe because I felt I couldnt' cheat? But this time around, keeping track has been a godsend. Why is it different? Well, I think a big part of it (maybe all of it?) is the elimination thing. Not being able to have eggs, milk or wheat has so greatly limited what I CAN eat, that if I don't write down what I DO eat, I'll never remember the ideas from one day to the next! I know, pathetic, right?
I can honestly say that in the past 8 weeks I have had almost no desire to "cheat". And trust me when I say that is unheard of for me! At this point, it's pretty easy, since the things I would most likely cheat with are things I can't eat due to the sensitivity thing. I mean, having bread and butter won't only wreak havoc on the scale, but it would totally screw up the whole elimination thing. And that, I'm just not willing to do at this point!
I must admit though that right now, having had my evening granola early, I am sorely tempted to go have more! Would it kill me? No, it's 140 calories, not 1000. But I am trying very hard to "ride the wave" and not do it. So, instead, I'm here writing about it. With the scale being so weird for me--up a bit one week, down alot the next, and then back and forth between the two--it would be easy for me to throw up my hands in disgust and just give up. But I'm not going to do that! The trend is downward, and that's what matters. I'm wearing my "skinnier" pants (if you can call a size 20W "skinny") and feeling great. I spent 30 minutes on the treadmill today. (WOOHOOO, that felt GOOD!!!! ) And I KNOW that I am eating just the way I should be eating. I've come prepared for the battle of the bulge. I am fully armed. And now the outcome is not up to me anymore. My body will do what it will do. I cannot force it to lose any faster or more consistently. I cannot make it walk faster, or climb higher, or stretch farther. It is what it is. As long as I keep doing my part (eating right, taking the supplements, and exercising), I know I am doing all I can to win the battle. The rest is up to my body. I just hope and pray it has forgiven me for all the years of abuse and neglect.
February 25, 2008 PT, The Doctor, and A Walk
That about sums up my day!I had PT at 8am today--a bit too early for my tastes, but I took what was available. Not very exciting--just some VERY gentle stretching. The only thing that hurts at all is when she raises my arm up over my head. OUCH!!
The visit to Dr. Dietch was pretty routine. I showed him my shoulder incision and said "THIS is what my abdomen is supposed to look like!" Then I showed him my stomach and he was pleased to see how well it's coming along. So now I don't have to go back for 8 weeks--April 21. Cool--who knows how much I'll be healed by then? Hopefully close to 100%. And he gave me full clearance for the gym, with no restrictions!
When I got home, it was only a little after 2. It was sunny and in the 40s, and I decided it was time for a walk. So I grabbed Duke and his leash, and off we went. Just a trip around the block, half a mile, but it felt so good. And, now that I think of it, MY HIPS DIDN'T HURT!!!! OMG, I can't believe it!! I didn't notice it when I was walking, but I just now realized there was no pain. That's a real first for me! Cool beans!!!
Food was fine today, and the indigestion of the past 2 days is mysteriously gone. Thank God! I have taken all my supplements with no problems. I got in all my water (9 glasses!) and I'm feeling good. Tomorrow is weigh in, and I will be interested to see what the scale says. I have no expectations. It's been a good week, so I would hope to lose, but I went off the "water pill" so who knows, maybe I'm retaining a bit? (Although I've been peeing the normal amount, so I wouldn't think so). Hopefully I'll get that treadmill clearance tomorrow AM, and be in the gym on the treadmill right after lunch. Finally, I can get myself back on track!
The visit to Dr. Dietch was pretty routine. I showed him my shoulder incision and said "THIS is what my abdomen is supposed to look like!" Then I showed him my stomach and he was pleased to see how well it's coming along. So now I don't have to go back for 8 weeks--April 21. Cool--who knows how much I'll be healed by then? Hopefully close to 100%. And he gave me full clearance for the gym, with no restrictions!
When I got home, it was only a little after 2. It was sunny and in the 40s, and I decided it was time for a walk. So I grabbed Duke and his leash, and off we went. Just a trip around the block, half a mile, but it felt so good. And, now that I think of it, MY HIPS DIDN'T HURT!!!! OMG, I can't believe it!! I didn't notice it when I was walking, but I just now realized there was no pain. That's a real first for me! Cool beans!!!
Food was fine today, and the indigestion of the past 2 days is mysteriously gone. Thank God! I have taken all my supplements with no problems. I got in all my water (9 glasses!) and I'm feeling good. Tomorrow is weigh in, and I will be interested to see what the scale says. I have no expectations. It's been a good week, so I would hope to lose, but I went off the "water pill" so who knows, maybe I'm retaining a bit? (Although I've been peeing the normal amount, so I wouldn't think so). Hopefully I'll get that treadmill clearance tomorrow AM, and be in the gym on the treadmill right after lunch. Finally, I can get myself back on track!
February 24, 2008 Where's The Water, Wendy??
For the first time in a good while, I was way under on my water today. Probably only had about 32 ounces. YIKES!!!
For starters, I woke up with still some heartburn, so I skipped the amino acid drink (8 oz water). Next, I only took my breakfast pills, no others all day (about 16 ounces more). Third, I was so engrossed in the message at church that I forgot to drink my bottle of water there, and came home with it still 3/4 full (18 ounces there). Fourth, I just didn't drink much more today (at least 16 ounces there. And last, I will skip my amino acid drink tonite, so there's another 8 ounces. Gotta do better tomorrow!!
I did stop and get some antacids for this heartburn, and it's helping a little. I can't figure it out--I've had NO heartburn until last night. I wonder what's up. Despite the heartburn, I've done OK with food today. Had my normal breakfast, tuna in a salad and rice for lunch, the usual snacks, and a very nice dinner at the kids' Master Chef awards dinner. They made a nice pear and walnut salad with a very light dressing. The roasted chicken thighs with carrots, onions and potatoes was delicious. I had to skip the bread, cookies, and "make your own sundaes", but it's just as well! I figure I had 1 veggie, 3 ounces of chicken, one starch worth of potato, 1 serving of nuts, and about 1/2 of a fat. Not too bad.
Tomorrow I have early PT at 8 am, and then I go see Dr. Dietch, who will be amazed at how much my abdomen has healed since he last saw me. It will be a busy day, but somehow I'm going to MAKE the time for a walk!!! (It's supposed to be up in the 40s, so I should be good at least for a trip around the block.)
Now I'm pooped and off to bed.
For starters, I woke up with still some heartburn, so I skipped the amino acid drink (8 oz water). Next, I only took my breakfast pills, no others all day (about 16 ounces more). Third, I was so engrossed in the message at church that I forgot to drink my bottle of water there, and came home with it still 3/4 full (18 ounces there). Fourth, I just didn't drink much more today (at least 16 ounces there. And last, I will skip my amino acid drink tonite, so there's another 8 ounces. Gotta do better tomorrow!!
I did stop and get some antacids for this heartburn, and it's helping a little. I can't figure it out--I've had NO heartburn until last night. I wonder what's up. Despite the heartburn, I've done OK with food today. Had my normal breakfast, tuna in a salad and rice for lunch, the usual snacks, and a very nice dinner at the kids' Master Chef awards dinner. They made a nice pear and walnut salad with a very light dressing. The roasted chicken thighs with carrots, onions and potatoes was delicious. I had to skip the bread, cookies, and "make your own sundaes", but it's just as well! I figure I had 1 veggie, 3 ounces of chicken, one starch worth of potato, 1 serving of nuts, and about 1/2 of a fat. Not too bad.
Tomorrow I have early PT at 8 am, and then I go see Dr. Dietch, who will be amazed at how much my abdomen has healed since he last saw me. It will be a busy day, but somehow I'm going to MAKE the time for a walk!!! (It's supposed to be up in the 40s, so I should be good at least for a trip around the block.)
Now I'm pooped and off to bed.
February 23, 2008 Heartburn/Reflux Rears It's Ugly Head
Oh, what I wouldn't give for some TUMS! Or some Mylanta! But we have none of that stuff in the house, because I NEVER get heartburn anymore!
I have no idea what caused it. I didn't eat anything new today except baked beans for lunch. I was fine all afternoon, it started after dinner. All I had for dinner was a 2 ounce extra lean hamburger, 1/2 cup of rice, and 1/2 cup of V8 juice. Weird! Oh, and I did put some fiber powder in my porridge for breakfast, but I can't imagine that would be a problem.
Now, if I could drink a nice glass of milk, I'd feel better. But noooooooo, no milk for me! Other than that it was a decent day. I got some shopping done so we're all restocked here. Had a nice day "off" from the kids, as they were with their father on a tour of Yankee stadium (which was reportedly "way cool"!) I went to make salmon for dinner tonite and when I opened it it smelled awful. Not just super fishy, but rotten. I was pretty cheezed because this was some VERY expensive salmon, but I was not going to worry about that--my mantra has always been "when in doubt, throw it out". Not taking any chances with bad fish!
Now everyone is back home, and Laura is not feeling well. Scratchy throat, stuffy nose, the whole shebang. And tomorrow is their Master Chef awards dinner where they are cooking for 50+ people. This could be interesting. Maybe I'll send her with a surgical mask! Poor thing. I just hope she doesn't share her germs with me--I do NOT need to get sick!! Not that being sick is any good for her--she can't afford to miss any school. Ay yi yi, it just never ends.I am looking forward to the next few days, where it is supposed to be dry and in the 40s. Hopefully good enough to venture out for a walk. And hopefully I can be on the treadmill Wednesday morning, if the doctors come through with their permissions! (Please, oh PLEASE!!!)
Well, lets go see what effect granola has on heartburn. Hopefully it helps. Then I'm off to bed, hopefully for a good night's sleep.
I have no idea what caused it. I didn't eat anything new today except baked beans for lunch. I was fine all afternoon, it started after dinner. All I had for dinner was a 2 ounce extra lean hamburger, 1/2 cup of rice, and 1/2 cup of V8 juice. Weird! Oh, and I did put some fiber powder in my porridge for breakfast, but I can't imagine that would be a problem.
Now, if I could drink a nice glass of milk, I'd feel better. But noooooooo, no milk for me! Other than that it was a decent day. I got some shopping done so we're all restocked here. Had a nice day "off" from the kids, as they were with their father on a tour of Yankee stadium (which was reportedly "way cool"!) I went to make salmon for dinner tonite and when I opened it it smelled awful. Not just super fishy, but rotten. I was pretty cheezed because this was some VERY expensive salmon, but I was not going to worry about that--my mantra has always been "when in doubt, throw it out". Not taking any chances with bad fish!
Now everyone is back home, and Laura is not feeling well. Scratchy throat, stuffy nose, the whole shebang. And tomorrow is their Master Chef awards dinner where they are cooking for 50+ people. This could be interesting. Maybe I'll send her with a surgical mask! Poor thing. I just hope she doesn't share her germs with me--I do NOT need to get sick!! Not that being sick is any good for her--she can't afford to miss any school. Ay yi yi, it just never ends.I am looking forward to the next few days, where it is supposed to be dry and in the 40s. Hopefully good enough to venture out for a walk. And hopefully I can be on the treadmill Wednesday morning, if the doctors come through with their permissions! (Please, oh PLEASE!!!)
Well, lets go see what effect granola has on heartburn. Hopefully it helps. Then I'm off to bed, hopefully for a good night's sleep.
February 22, 2008 Snow Day
Uggggh! My first wakeup call came at 4:26 am. "We have a 2 hour delay". OK, I can live with that. I looked out the window and really didn't see much snow. But hey, who knows? The second wakeup call came at 6:29 am. "The 2 hour delay has been changed to no school". CRUD!!!! I didn't bother to look outside. I just reset the alarm from 7:00 to 8:00 and went back to sleep.
When I got up, I did look outside, and it was still snowing pretty hard. And there was a good bit on the ground too. Our street had yet to be plowed. This was NOT a good sign!!! My first chore was to call and cancel Physical Therapy. No WAY was I going out in this weather!!! Then I got started on breakfast and the pill parade. The kids were, of course, ecstatic to have a snow day. (I just keep thinking about how it's one day more in June...) They hurried through breakfast and headed out into the snow. My dear neighbor (who thinks I'm doing HIM a favor...) came and charged up the snowblower and plowed my driveway, then headed to his house to do his own. Laura measured the snow on the patio table (our usual measuring spot) and it was 4 inches (and still snowing!) By the time it stopped, we'd had a good 4.5 inches (if you can call that good...)
I just stayed in the house all day. I didn't get to the grocery store (no 10 gallons of milk, 8 loaves of bread and 9 dozen eggs for me! ) so I had to rethink some food choices--I was out of apples, nuts, pears and a few other things that I'd planned to get today after PT.
My "fill in" helper arrived about 10. Her name is Monica and she is from Kenya. Very nice, but quiet. The kids seem to like her. I spent some time reading, a nice change lately. I even ordered a bunch of books online--gotta stock up for all my summer reading!!!
I put our flank steak in the crock pot with some mangos and juices and garlic and it cooked for a few hours. Made the house smell really yummy! It turned out quite well--very tender for flank steak!
Now it's 9:00, all but the last few pills are taken, all the food is in except granola, and I'm within my boundaries again for everything. I even hit 29 or 30 grams of fiber! I guess I'll do my last set of exercises and head to bed soon. Not the most exciting day, but it sure was relaxing. And the kids behaved so nicely--almost no fighting at all!
When I got up, I did look outside, and it was still snowing pretty hard. And there was a good bit on the ground too. Our street had yet to be plowed. This was NOT a good sign!!! My first chore was to call and cancel Physical Therapy. No WAY was I going out in this weather!!! Then I got started on breakfast and the pill parade. The kids were, of course, ecstatic to have a snow day. (I just keep thinking about how it's one day more in June...) They hurried through breakfast and headed out into the snow. My dear neighbor (who thinks I'm doing HIM a favor...) came and charged up the snowblower and plowed my driveway, then headed to his house to do his own. Laura measured the snow on the patio table (our usual measuring spot) and it was 4 inches (and still snowing!) By the time it stopped, we'd had a good 4.5 inches (if you can call that good...)
I just stayed in the house all day. I didn't get to the grocery store (no 10 gallons of milk, 8 loaves of bread and 9 dozen eggs for me! ) so I had to rethink some food choices--I was out of apples, nuts, pears and a few other things that I'd planned to get today after PT.
My "fill in" helper arrived about 10. Her name is Monica and she is from Kenya. Very nice, but quiet. The kids seem to like her. I spent some time reading, a nice change lately. I even ordered a bunch of books online--gotta stock up for all my summer reading!!!
I put our flank steak in the crock pot with some mangos and juices and garlic and it cooked for a few hours. Made the house smell really yummy! It turned out quite well--very tender for flank steak!
Now it's 9:00, all but the last few pills are taken, all the food is in except granola, and I'm within my boundaries again for everything. I even hit 29 or 30 grams of fiber! I guess I'll do my last set of exercises and head to bed soon. Not the most exciting day, but it sure was relaxing. And the kids behaved so nicely--almost no fighting at all!
February 21, 2008 All This, And Fiber Too??
I've gotten used to writing down everything I eat, and every bit of exercise. I'm having no problem with getting in enough water. I am almost always within the range for calories, fat, carbs, protein, and sodium. I've even got my gallon of pills spaced out through the day in a way that I can get them all in without too much difficulty. And now I find out that I'm not getting enough fiber??? How can this be? I am eating a healthy, balanced diet. 3 fruits and 4 or 5 veggies a day. Only whole grains. Umm, so how come I only come up with 24 grams, and I need 25 to35 grams a day? OK, so that's pretty close, but I figured I'd be right up there in the mid-range at least! Where the heck am I supposed to find this extra fiber? Eat tree bark? OK, so I could switch my breakfast jjuice to an actual breakfast fruit (which I'd actually thought of myself earlier today, and maybe I'll do just that). But what else can I possibly do? Take fiber supplements? YIKES! If I have to take another supplement I swear I will SCREAM!!!!!! Ya know, if I could eat wheat, this would be SOOOO much easier! All sorts of great high fiber wheat things out there to eat. I could have Kashi. Or bulghur, or even whole wheat couscous. All natural whole grain bread, anyone? But no, that's not an option.
Ok, enough of the whining. It was a pretty good day otherwise! I had my first iron infusion this afternoon, and someow my hemoglobin managed to jump from 9.5-10.5 even BEFORE the IV was hooked up! Hmmm, could this have anything to do with the way I'm eating and the fact that I am taking some homeopathic thing to increase iron absorption?? COOL! It's awesome to actually SEE results! I went to measure myself this morning and couldn't find the tape measure. I swear that's about the 3rd one that's disappeared around here! Guess I'll need to get a new one tomorrow so I can do it. I can actually see some difference when I look in the mirror now. It's pretty cool actually. Wait til spring comes and I'm out of my bulky clothes and back in capris and blouses and I can really see it! WooHoo!!
We are supposed to get 3 inches of snow tonite. I hope not. I hate snow. Plus, then the kids will be off from school and I'll have to drag them with me to PT, and that would NOT be a good thing! NO SNOW! NO SNOW! NO SNOW!
Ok, enough of the whining. It was a pretty good day otherwise! I had my first iron infusion this afternoon, and someow my hemoglobin managed to jump from 9.5-10.5 even BEFORE the IV was hooked up! Hmmm, could this have anything to do with the way I'm eating and the fact that I am taking some homeopathic thing to increase iron absorption?? COOL! It's awesome to actually SEE results! I went to measure myself this morning and couldn't find the tape measure. I swear that's about the 3rd one that's disappeared around here! Guess I'll need to get a new one tomorrow so I can do it. I can actually see some difference when I look in the mirror now. It's pretty cool actually. Wait til spring comes and I'm out of my bulky clothes and back in capris and blouses and I can really see it! WooHoo!!
We are supposed to get 3 inches of snow tonite. I hope not. I hate snow. Plus, then the kids will be off from school and I'll have to drag them with me to PT, and that would NOT be a good thing! NO SNOW! NO SNOW! NO SNOW!
February 20, 2008 Backing Off A Bit
So I lowered my calories to 1300-1500, and it seems to have gone better today. Also, Judy (nutritionist) emailed back and told me that was OK and what I should cut out. So tomorrow I'll try to do it her way. It seems like she cut out all protein, so I may do a hybrid.
For breakfast I only had 1/2 cup of oatmeal instead of a cup. Judy said I can decrease my sausages from 3 to 2, which I WILL do--it only drops 2/3 of a Protein. She also said to cut my AM snack in 1/2, so instead of 2 ounces of turkey, just have 1, and only 1/2 a fruit. I can do that too! I had honeydew with my turkey today, it was yummy!
Lunch was a finely chopped salad of carrot, celery, pepper and tomato with 2 ounces tuna and a T of dressing. It was yummy and went down with NO problem! Also a small sweet potato with healthy margerine. For once I didnt' feel overwhelmed by the amount. Maybe avoiding lettuce is a good idea? I also divided up my ginormous Omega 3s at lunch, took 1 before and 1 after. In any event, I was fine after lunch! My apple and nuts were fine too. Judy says I can go to 1 T of nuts instead of 2, but that seems to me to be a "why bother?" I think I'd just as soon knock off a starch, thank you very much! For dinner I took it really easy. 2/3 cup of rice with 3/4 cup of my meat and veggie sauce. It was yummy, not overly filling, and settled fine.
So now all that's left is granola for a snack. I've even gotten in all my supplements with no problem. Just have a very few left for bedtime. I've split them up into 5 seperate times--breakfast, AM snack, lunch, dinner, and bedtime. I've got 40 pills a day to take , this is the ONLY way to do it!
I saw my PCP today and their scale says I've lost 10 pounds in less than 4 weeks. For some reason, their scale is only 5 pounds up over mine, rather than 9. That 5 pounds is easily attributed to clothing and food/water intake. I know I've really only lost 6.5 in that time. Not sure why their scale is so much "better" this week, but I'll take it!! I got clearance from the doctor to use the treadmill, and the elliptical when the ortho clears me for it. YAY!!! Now I just have to convince the ortho that the treadmill is no different than walking down the street, and I will be back to the gym!!!!! I was so determined to walk today that I did 10 laps of figure 8s around the kitchen and hall. Only got in about 0.2 miles, since I was running kids around, but at least I walked! I'll do more tomorrow. WAY too cold to walk outside!
PT went well. I was with Heather again and she is SO much more gentle than Charlie! Just passive stretching, followed by ice. It felt MUCH better today than Monday. I even went to the Chiropractor this AM for a much needed adjustment. My neck was way out from wearing the sling.
I'm determined to be in bed by 10 tonite so I can get in my 8 hours of sleep. This AM I was actually tired and considered going back to bed, but I didn't do it.
I was just looking at the photo of me from 2004 and I'm amazed at how much thinner I looked, even though I was only about 30 pounds or so lighter than now. It will be good to get back down there again. Hopefully in time for Scotland--that would be awesome!
For breakfast I only had 1/2 cup of oatmeal instead of a cup. Judy said I can decrease my sausages from 3 to 2, which I WILL do--it only drops 2/3 of a Protein. She also said to cut my AM snack in 1/2, so instead of 2 ounces of turkey, just have 1, and only 1/2 a fruit. I can do that too! I had honeydew with my turkey today, it was yummy!
Lunch was a finely chopped salad of carrot, celery, pepper and tomato with 2 ounces tuna and a T of dressing. It was yummy and went down with NO problem! Also a small sweet potato with healthy margerine. For once I didnt' feel overwhelmed by the amount. Maybe avoiding lettuce is a good idea? I also divided up my ginormous Omega 3s at lunch, took 1 before and 1 after. In any event, I was fine after lunch! My apple and nuts were fine too. Judy says I can go to 1 T of nuts instead of 2, but that seems to me to be a "why bother?" I think I'd just as soon knock off a starch, thank you very much! For dinner I took it really easy. 2/3 cup of rice with 3/4 cup of my meat and veggie sauce. It was yummy, not overly filling, and settled fine.
So now all that's left is granola for a snack. I've even gotten in all my supplements with no problem. Just have a very few left for bedtime. I've split them up into 5 seperate times--breakfast, AM snack, lunch, dinner, and bedtime. I've got 40 pills a day to take , this is the ONLY way to do it!
I saw my PCP today and their scale says I've lost 10 pounds in less than 4 weeks. For some reason, their scale is only 5 pounds up over mine, rather than 9. That 5 pounds is easily attributed to clothing and food/water intake. I know I've really only lost 6.5 in that time. Not sure why their scale is so much "better" this week, but I'll take it!! I got clearance from the doctor to use the treadmill, and the elliptical when the ortho clears me for it. YAY!!! Now I just have to convince the ortho that the treadmill is no different than walking down the street, and I will be back to the gym!!!!! I was so determined to walk today that I did 10 laps of figure 8s around the kitchen and hall. Only got in about 0.2 miles, since I was running kids around, but at least I walked! I'll do more tomorrow. WAY too cold to walk outside!
PT went well. I was with Heather again and she is SO much more gentle than Charlie! Just passive stretching, followed by ice. It felt MUCH better today than Monday. I even went to the Chiropractor this AM for a much needed adjustment. My neck was way out from wearing the sling.
I'm determined to be in bed by 10 tonite so I can get in my 8 hours of sleep. This AM I was actually tired and considered going back to bed, but I didn't do it.
I was just looking at the photo of me from 2004 and I'm amazed at how much thinner I looked, even though I was only about 30 pounds or so lighter than now. It will be good to get back down there again. Hopefully in time for Scotland--that would be awesome!
February 19, 2008 A Happy Weigh-In And Other Stories
So the day got off to a great start when I stepped on the scale and found that I've lost 4.8 pounds this week!!! WOOOHOOOO!! That gives me a net loss of 2.3 for the past 2 weeks. Not bad, I'll take it. So I've lost I think like 13.9 so far this year? I forget what my actual starting weight was! Anyway, I'm losing, and that's what counts, right?
Took Mom for the annual squashing of the b00bies ritual, and then, since we were so close to the Whole Foods in Middletown, we went shopping. This store is WAY bigger than the one by Mom's so it was quite an adventure! We got tons of produce, and I was surprised to find that V-8 actually makes an Organic version! I was disappointed in the salmon--looked very un-fresh--so I passed. I'm frankly starting to feel like I'm turning into a salmon, since I eat so much! I did find boneless turkey breasts, which I love to do in the crock pot, so I got 2 of them. Also snagged a nice flank steak which will be a great crock pot meal for Friday night when the kids have cooking class. I even treated myself to a nice filet mignon for dinner tonite--more on that later.
We came home and ate lunch. Now, it was 1:00, I was actually a bit hungry, and I only had 1/2 cup of rice, a small salad, and a 3 ounce turkey burger. NOT a huge lunch! The only supplements I took were my 2 ginormous Omega 3 pills. I felt very very full. At 3:30 I still felt too full for a snack, so I skipped it. At 5:45, still not feeling particularly hungry, I had dinner. A 3.5 ounce filet, a small baked potato, and a small glass of V8. I didn't finish any of it. Left at least 1/2 ounce of the meat, most of the potato, and about 1/4 of the V8. No supplements. I am STUFFED. Here it is over 3 hours later, and the mere thought of food makes me want to barf. So, no snack, no supplements for me tonite.This is getting rediculous!! I am physically unable to get in the calories the nutritionist wants, including 10 ounces of protein, plus the supplements. It is just WAY too much for my tiny little pouch of a stomach! Time to send off an email and find out what the heck I should be doing.
So, as if that all wasn't enough, I get a call from Laura's teacher that she had a science project due today and didn't finish it. Huh? I asked her Thursday, before the Four Day Weekend if she had any homework. She said no, and I asked her several times! So now, the highest possible grade she can get is a 50. Great. So on top of the fact that she had to do it all tonite, in addition to her math homework (division, which she is CLUELESS with), I have to deal with the fact that my 12 year old daughter is a Pathological Liar!!!!! I dont' know what to do with her. She even lied about her Life Skills assignment, saying that I'd filled out the form for last week. Um, NO, I did NOT fill out the form! She swears I did, I KNOW I didn't. So she is grounded, and I get to choose her clothes for the next 2 weeks, which she HATES. Hopefully it will at least make her THINK, as she is sitting there in nice, feminine clothing instead of her tomboy football jerseys and sweatshirts. Then again, I don't think ANYTHING gets through that thick head of hers!!I HATE this stuff. This is SO not the life I signed up for!!!!!!!
Took Mom for the annual squashing of the b00bies ritual, and then, since we were so close to the Whole Foods in Middletown, we went shopping. This store is WAY bigger than the one by Mom's so it was quite an adventure! We got tons of produce, and I was surprised to find that V-8 actually makes an Organic version! I was disappointed in the salmon--looked very un-fresh--so I passed. I'm frankly starting to feel like I'm turning into a salmon, since I eat so much! I did find boneless turkey breasts, which I love to do in the crock pot, so I got 2 of them. Also snagged a nice flank steak which will be a great crock pot meal for Friday night when the kids have cooking class. I even treated myself to a nice filet mignon for dinner tonite--more on that later.
We came home and ate lunch. Now, it was 1:00, I was actually a bit hungry, and I only had 1/2 cup of rice, a small salad, and a 3 ounce turkey burger. NOT a huge lunch! The only supplements I took were my 2 ginormous Omega 3 pills. I felt very very full. At 3:30 I still felt too full for a snack, so I skipped it. At 5:45, still not feeling particularly hungry, I had dinner. A 3.5 ounce filet, a small baked potato, and a small glass of V8. I didn't finish any of it. Left at least 1/2 ounce of the meat, most of the potato, and about 1/4 of the V8. No supplements. I am STUFFED. Here it is over 3 hours later, and the mere thought of food makes me want to barf. So, no snack, no supplements for me tonite.This is getting rediculous!! I am physically unable to get in the calories the nutritionist wants, including 10 ounces of protein, plus the supplements. It is just WAY too much for my tiny little pouch of a stomach! Time to send off an email and find out what the heck I should be doing.
So, as if that all wasn't enough, I get a call from Laura's teacher that she had a science project due today and didn't finish it. Huh? I asked her Thursday, before the Four Day Weekend if she had any homework. She said no, and I asked her several times! So now, the highest possible grade she can get is a 50. Great. So on top of the fact that she had to do it all tonite, in addition to her math homework (division, which she is CLUELESS with), I have to deal with the fact that my 12 year old daughter is a Pathological Liar!!!!! I dont' know what to do with her. She even lied about her Life Skills assignment, saying that I'd filled out the form for last week. Um, NO, I did NOT fill out the form! She swears I did, I KNOW I didn't. So she is grounded, and I get to choose her clothes for the next 2 weeks, which she HATES. Hopefully it will at least make her THINK, as she is sitting there in nice, feminine clothing instead of her tomboy football jerseys and sweatshirts. Then again, I don't think ANYTHING gets through that thick head of hers!!I HATE this stuff. This is SO not the life I signed up for!!!!!!!
February 18, 2008 Walking In The Rain
Yes, that's right! I went for a walk. For 1.3 miles or so. For an HOUR. In the RAIN! I am quite impressed with myself right now! I would usually have used the rain as an excuse not to walk, but I had made up my mind that I was going to walk today, since it's 62 degrees out, and a little rain was NOT going to stop me!! It will be interesting to see what the scale shows tomorrow. I've been doing really well on calories, getting some exercise, taking my supplements, drinking my water. One would THINK I should lose some significant poundage. But of course, one might be wrong--I've gained before when it didn't make any sense! We'll see tomorrow though.
PT was good today. I was with my old pal Charlie. I think he overdid it a bit, so we will back off a bit next time. (I checked with the doctor and he doesn't want me doing any active stuff yet, only passive.) I ran into the OT guy who does lymphatic drainage (actually there are 5 of them there who do it!) and he said they are all trained the same way as the girl at Canyon Ranch! So I am asking Dr. Rossi for a referral for lymphatic drainage. I can't imagine that she won't agree--it can only help me.
An interesting thing I noted on my walk today (and other days) is that my hips really do bother me when I walk any distance. I think I will have to get back to the Neuromuscular therapy and have her work on my hips. Gotta loosen them up!
I readjusted my food plan a little. I was starting to have a hard time getting in my evening snack. Not only not hungry, but still full from dinner,and then when I add in the amino acid drink and the supplements--NO WAY!! So I switched the turkey and mango snack to the morning, kept the apple and nuts in the afternoon, and then the evening, IF I want a snack, will be the granola. If I don't have it, no biggie. I am also limiting myself to 3 ounces of protein at dinner. last night I had 4.5 and it was fine--until time for my snack. I ended up eating 2 dried apricots instead, and even that was too much.I also decided to move my huge Omega 3 pills to lunchtime. It doesn't matter when I take them, and at night they are too much. So this should help. Now if I have 1/2 my night pills and my amino acid drink with dinner, that only leaves a few supplements for bedtime, and that should be ok.
If I get any more supplements, I am going to need a new stomach to put them in!! Tonite Mom is here, and we have no kids, so we are having salmon. With a baked potato and green beans, that should be fine. Plus we will eat at 6, so by the time I have my snack at 9, it will be 3 hours.
Off to start cooking!!
PT was good today. I was with my old pal Charlie. I think he overdid it a bit, so we will back off a bit next time. (I checked with the doctor and he doesn't want me doing any active stuff yet, only passive.) I ran into the OT guy who does lymphatic drainage (actually there are 5 of them there who do it!) and he said they are all trained the same way as the girl at Canyon Ranch! So I am asking Dr. Rossi for a referral for lymphatic drainage. I can't imagine that she won't agree--it can only help me.
An interesting thing I noted on my walk today (and other days) is that my hips really do bother me when I walk any distance. I think I will have to get back to the Neuromuscular therapy and have her work on my hips. Gotta loosen them up!
I readjusted my food plan a little. I was starting to have a hard time getting in my evening snack. Not only not hungry, but still full from dinner,and then when I add in the amino acid drink and the supplements--NO WAY!! So I switched the turkey and mango snack to the morning, kept the apple and nuts in the afternoon, and then the evening, IF I want a snack, will be the granola. If I don't have it, no biggie. I am also limiting myself to 3 ounces of protein at dinner. last night I had 4.5 and it was fine--until time for my snack. I ended up eating 2 dried apricots instead, and even that was too much.I also decided to move my huge Omega 3 pills to lunchtime. It doesn't matter when I take them, and at night they are too much. So this should help. Now if I have 1/2 my night pills and my amino acid drink with dinner, that only leaves a few supplements for bedtime, and that should be ok.
If I get any more supplements, I am going to need a new stomach to put them in!! Tonite Mom is here, and we have no kids, so we are having salmon. With a baked potato and green beans, that should be fine. Plus we will eat at 6, so by the time I have my snack at 9, it will be 3 hours.
Off to start cooking!!
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